


The Grey

by crochetaway



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-08-22 12:17:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 41,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16597775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crochetaway/pseuds/crochetaway
Summary: Hermione Granger made a rare mistake at work. Now Sirius Black is back from the dead. Can Hermione figure out a way to send him back for good before her heart becomes too involved? Or will Sirius manage to stay in the land of the living?





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: This story began as part of a Hermione Granger Big Bang fest, but then summer rolled around, and I was finding it hard to write. This is a winter story to me, it just feels like something that needs to be written in the fall/winter. I have several chapters completed and plan to have this story done by early 2019. .I don't have a set update schedule on this but expect about once a week or so.**
> 
> **This story is rated M for language, themes, and sexual content. Please be advised.**
> 
> **Also - this story has an ambiguously happy ending.**
> 
> **Beta'd by the lovely msmerlin. Thank you for your work on this!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**
> 
> **Update! Many, many thanks to LaBelladoneX and her daughter for helping to make the Irish translations not straight from Google Translate. I'm terrible about telling people that I use Google Translate because I just forget, but I did, and it was all wrong and LaBelladoneX kindly PM'd me to help me correct it. So many thanks to her! Also, apparently I was calling the language the wrong thing too, so my apologies there as well.**
> 
> **Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

  

 

 

* * *

_There is so much grey to every story — nothing is so black and white._

_-Lisa Ling_

* * *

_October 2021_

* * *

Hermione Granger-Weasley coughed and waved her hand in front of her face as the dust settled from the giant tome she had set onto her desk. It was the last book from a collection that had just been donated from the Selwyn estate. She'd been saving it for last, since it was the biggest, and couldn't wait to dig her fingers into it. Hermione had been working as a researcher in the Department of Mysteries for the last nine years, moving to a lower stress department after her divorce from Ron. The Ministry had rooms full of texts and artifacts both donated and confiscated, and not nearly enough manpower to go through them all. It was just Hermione and her boss, an elderly man named Aggie Corvin.

Aggie decided on the priority of projects, leaving Hermione the best part, in her opinion. She read every book, examined each artifact and decided whether it was worth going to the Ministry archives. Some aspects of her job were really boring, for instance even if she knew the book was already in the archives, Hermione had to compare the texts to make sure they were actually identical. That part she hated but had created a spell to make it go easier. Her favorite were well-known texts that were annotated by hand. Sometimes the annotations were enlightening, most often they were snarky and gave Hermione a good giggle.

She thrived on books like the one in front of her. It was old, at least a few hundred years, there was no identifying text or marks on the cover or binding, and she was sure she'd never seen one like it before. Which meant, it was probably an undiscovered text. She smiled as she ran her hands down the cover. She'd already checked it over thoroughly for any traces of dark magic; there were none. The book hummed pleasantly under her fingers, as magical books tended to do. It made her even more excited.

"That the last of the lot?" Aggie asked as he peered around the corner to Hermione's office. Aggie had wispy white hair that sat on his head like a corona around the sun. He had dark, brown skin that was littered in liver spots and had been the head of the Department of Mysteries Magical Artifact division for longer than Hermione had been alive.

"It is," Hermione nodded as she glanced up at her boss. It was nearing the end of the day, and Hermione knew she should wait for tomorrow to open it, but she couldn't help getting at least a few minutes to look at it tonight.

"And that's the one you think is totally unique?" Aggie inquired as he folded his arms across his chest and leaned against the door frame.

"Yep," Hermione grinned. "I've checked, double-checked, and triple-checked. No Dark magic residue and no identifying characteristics. Unless you count that it having no identifying characteristics as an identifying characteristic."

Aggie grinned, "Maybe, it should be one? Although, I haven't come across too many books with no identifying characteristics. What did you enter into the registry?"

All books were registered with all of the details one could think of, size, weight, page count, binding type, cover type, and on and on.

"The usual, and that author and title were unknown or undetermined at the time."

Aggie nodded, returning her grin. He at least understood her excitement to examine a new text.

"Don't stay too late. I'll have Brown check on you. If you're still here when he comes around don't bother coming in tomorrow."

Hermione smiled indulgently at her boss. "Of course not, Aggie."

Aggie left her office with a wave of his hand and Hermione shook her head at her boss. Geoffrey Brown was the only maintenance staff member cleared for cleaning the Department of Mysteries, and he and Aggie were good friends. Aggie liked to keep Hermione from overworking herself, as was she wouldn't So he would often send Brown around to make sure she'd gone home. If Brown caught her still working, he'd report to Aggie. The first time she was caught, Hermione had scoffed and came into work the next morning at her normal start time of seven. Aggie had tried to order her to leave, but she ignored him. So he marched her upstairs to the Atrium and forced her into the Floo. Hermione was humiliated and properly chastised. He'd clearly shown her he was not the be messed with and over the years, Hermione had learned to respect him for that. She would still occasionally stay late. However, she knew better than to come into work the next day. Aggie would just drag her back home again, and it wasn't worth the hassle.

She thought it was sweet he cared so much about her work/life balance, and if she were honest with herself, she'd probably live at the Ministry in order to avoid going back to her lonely cottage. At least during the school year. During Hogwarts breaks and in the summer Hermione was a model employee because her kids were home. Even if they were at Ron's, Hermione didn't permit herself to stay at work too late. She never knew if plans would fall through with her ex-husband, and never wanted her children to feel like her work mattered more than they did.

It was mid-October now, and Rose and Hugo had been back at Hogwarts for a month and a half already as the days went on, Hermione found herself working later and later — even bringing work home with her if necessary. She knew she lived a boring life, and most of the time she was fine with that. She loved the access to research and rare texts that she had on a day-to-day basis. Her days as a social crusader were over. She preferred to stay out of the spotlight. Especially since her ex-husband and his wife were always in it.

Ron and Romilda. Who would have thought they'd be married when they all attended Hogwarts together so many years ago? The love potion incident from Hermione and Ron's sixth year at Hogwarts was now discussed as though it was something sweet for Romilda to have done. Nevermind that Harry was her target, or that Ron had ended up ingesting poison before he was cured, or that he'd been with Lavender Brown at the time. Hermione wanted to scoff, but the reminder of Lavender sobered her. Lavender hadn't survived the final battle, and it was a death that Hermione still had a hard time with, even twenty-three years later. Neither Harry nor Ron understood. Not only had she roomed with Lavender for six years, but they had also been friends, before Ron anyway.

Hermione sighed as her thoughts turned to her ex. Ron. Most days she tried not to think about him. He'd broken her heart, and even nine years later, the wound still felt raw sometimes. Despite the fact that he'd given her the best things about her life, their children. His negligence and apathy had killed their marriage faster than any affair would have. After Hugo had been born Ron had just stopped caring about anything. Least of all, Hermione and the kids. Hermione had tried, for three years she'd tried to keep Ron and the family together. Hermione tried her best to be the perfect wife, but she couldn't give up working. Her mum had worked a full-time job, and Hermione was no different. Molly watched their kids, mostly at Ron's insistence, and Hermione let her with a smile, but her teeth gritted at the snide, anti-feminist, anti-Hermione comments Molly made day in and day out. Every day she got home from work in time to pick the kids up from Molly and Arthur's and still have time to make dinner for Ron when he got off at the joke shop at six. Faithfully, she cleaned their house, made meals, and worked a full-time job. And Ron just didn't care. After she'd successfully pulled together Hugo's third birthday party all by herself, she'd had enough. She gave Ron an ultimatum. He could either begin to help around the house, or she was done. Ron chose divorce.

It did make her life more difficult, but at least she didn't have resentment against Ron boiling under her skin like lava anymore. She was free to let go of all of her feelings toward Ron, and with the help of her therapist, she did just that. Except she couldn't quite forgive him. When he'd married Romilda Vane less than a year after their divorce was final, she hadn't been all that surprised. Ron couldn't function without a woman around to take care of him, and Hermione had come to terms with it long ago.

She shook herself from her thoughts and glanced at her watch. It was half-past five. Brown wouldn't be around until eight or nine, so she had plenty of time to dig into the book in front of her and leave the department before he came around.

Hermione was too excited to sit, and in truth, the book was a foot and a half thick, standing would make it easier to examine the pages. She cast one last diagnostic charm, making sure there wasn't a trigger or trip that would spring upon opening the book. When it came back clean, she laid her wand to the side. Slowly, with her right hand, she turned the cover over. The inside was blank, but that wasn't unusual. She turned the first page, it too was blank, also not unusual. Older books especially tended to have a few blank pages at the beginning. Hermione kept turning the pages. They were all blank. She frowned and began turning them faster and faster. Now she was almost a quarter way through the book, and they were all blank. Maybe a Revealing charm? She placed her right hand flat on the page, to hold to book open as she thought about it. A hum of magic responded, and Hermione couldn't help but send a soft wave of her own magic back at the book.

When she looked down at the page, there was writing under her hand. She moved her hand, and exactly three sentences written in what appeared to be Irish had appeared.

" _Cosantóir draíochta, caomhnóir draíochta: An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath? Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo,_ " she mumbled aloud before she could stop herself.

As soon as Hermione realized what she had done, her eyes widened, and she jumped back from the book, looking around her office fearfully. The book thumped closed loudly, making Hermione start once more. She felt goose-flesh break out across her skin. A gentle swirl of magic surrounded her and was gone once more.  _Fuck._

Hermione could not believe she had just said an unknown incantation out loud. How stupid was she? It was the first rule of research, and in all her years in the Department of Mysteries, she had never once broken it. She shook her head. Maybe she was more tired than she thought. She glanced at the innocuous-looking tome once more and decided she wasn't going to touch it again.

Clearly, there was some sort of low-level compulsion charm on it or something.  _A compulsion charm that didn't show itself when you were examining it?_  A voice whispered in her head. Hermione knew it was ridiculous. She shook her head and buried that thought. Grasping her wand, she levitated the book to the safebox she kept on her bookshelf next to her office door. It was a magic-deadening box. It would deaden any magic the book contained, meaning that until the book was removed from the box, it was harmless.

She passed Brown on her way out of the Department and ducked behind a desk before he could see her. No way was she not coming in to examine that book some more tomorrow. Hermione glanced at her watch as she waited for Brown to pass and a frown crossed her face. It was five-thirty when she opened the book, and now it was eight. Where had two-and-a-half hours gone? 

* * *

Hermione sipped from her glass of wine as she flipped through the Irish to English translation book. It was tattered and torn, a lot of magical artifacts were written in Irish and Hermione had put this book through its paces.

She glanced at the parchment she had next to the book. She had a few of the words translated already:

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo._

She frowned ' _féidir_ ' was can, ah there it was, ' _fheiceáil_ ' was see. She sighed and took another sip from her wine glass. This was taking forever. She wished she was fluent or knew someone who was.

' _M_ _é_ ' was 'me' and ' _tríd an_ ' was 'through the,' what was the last bit? She searched through the book for ' _Liath'_... Grey. That's what it was. She turned back to her parchment:

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you see me through the Grey?

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoineatá beo._

She glared down at the parchment. Well, she could figure out part of the last bit:

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you see me through the Grey?

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo._

through the

' _Tar t_ _ríd_ _'_ is come through, and ' _imbhalla'_  is… she couldn't find it. Hermione let out a frustrated sound and looked back at the parchment in front of her:

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you see me through the Grey?

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo._

Come through the

She closed the dictionary and rubbed her eyes. This could wait. She was exhausted and could finish the rest tomorrow. She stood from the little kitchen table and tossed the dictionary in her bag to bring to work with her in the morning. After rinsing out her wine glass, Hermione retired to bed.

* * *

" _Hermione…"_

_Someone was calling her name. She could just hear it over the sound of wind rushing in her ears. She looked around and seemed to be in a formless grey cloud. Nothing was there. Nothing was solid. The grey swirled and twirled around her in tantalizing patterns that were almost recognizable, but not quite. She spun in a slow circle, trying to make sense of the formless landscape before her. But nothing made sense. Her hair whipped around her head in the ever-present wind._

" _Hermione," the voice whispered to her. She knew that voice, who was it? She whipped her head toward the sound and took a small step in that direction._

" _Hermione." She turned around looking for the person calling her name. All she saw was grey. Where was she? The voice came from a different direction, and she turned toward it._

" _Hermione!" The voice was louder. Closer. Hermione turned around again. She didn't see anyone. The voice sounded like it came from behind her, so she started walking toward it. She had to find who was calling her. She didn't know why, but she was compelled to search out the caller._

" _Hermione!" Even louder and closer now, she began to run toward the voice. She was finally going in the right direction. She heard her name called over and over again and ran faster and faster toward the sound._

" _Hermione!" She stopped. The voice was right next to her. Who was it? She turned toward the sound and came face-to-face with a dark-haired man. He had grey eyes and dark, wavy hair down to his shoulders. He looked so familiar to her, but she couldn't place him. He was tall, towering over her. But he didn't see her. He seemed to look right through her._

" _Who are you?" she asked. She cocked her head to the side like she would recognize him from the new angle. His name was right on the tip of her tongue. She definitely knew this man. She took him in entirely, he was wearing an old-fashioned three-piece suit with a wizarding robe thrown over top._

" _Hermione!" he shouted as if he couldn't see her. He was standing right in front of her. She took a step closer and reached out her hand, but he seemed to move backward. She began walking toward him as he looked around, looking for her._

" _What is your name?" she asked again and the closer she got to him, the further he went. She didn't understand this place or this man in front of her. Who was he? Why did she recognize him? Why couldn't she remember him?_

" _HERMIONE!"_

* * *

Hermione bolted upright in bed, she was panting and covered in sweat, and the phantom man's voice was still ringing in her ears. She looked around. She was in her cottage, it was early, but she could see the sun shining through her window. She glanced at her bedside clock and groaned; it was half-past seven already. Normally she was at work by now. Sighing, she stood from the bed and stretched her back. Getting old wasn't fun, even if she was a witch.

Coffee. She needed coffee first. She ambled to the kitchen and began boiling water on the cooker. After scooping a couple of tablespoons of coffee grounds into her french press, she leaned her bum against the counter and yawned. An owl flapped at the window above the sink, and she opened it to let him in. He was carrying the  _Daily Prophet._  She glanced at it and rubbed her bleary eyes. She still couldn't figure out that bizarre dream she had. She gazed idly at the headlines as she tried to grasp the edges of her dream. But like all dreams, the more she thought about it, the more it faded away.

Who was that man she dreamt about? She was sure she knew him, but she didn't recognize him. She shook herself as she pushed the plunger on the french press and poured herself a cup of coffee. Breathing deeply, she took her first sip and closed her eyes.

When she opened them, the man from her dream was standing in her kitchen. Same dark, wavy hair, same grey eyes, same old-fashioned three-piece suit with a wizarding robe thrown over it. And she suddenly remembered exactly who he was.

"Don't scream," Sirius Black said as Hermione inhaled to do just that.


	2. Caught

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Beta'd by the lovely msmerlin and BirdieMing! Thank you both for your work on this!**
> 
> **Again many, many thanks to LaBelladoneX and her daughter for helping to make the Irish translations not straight from Google Translate. I'm terrible about telling people that I use Google Translate because I just forget, but I did, and it was all wrong and LaBelladoneX kindly PM'd me to help me correct it. So many thanks to her! Also, apparently I was calling the language the wrong thing too, so my apologies there as well.**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_Everything is grey_

_his hair_

_his smoke_

_his dreams_

_-Halsey_

* * *

_Chapter 2: Caught_

* * *

_October 2021_

* * *

Hermione stopped herself from screaming but dropped her cup, hot coffee splashing onto her legs as the mug hit the tile of her kitchen and shattered.

"Fuck!" She jumped back, looking down at the mess. Her wand was still on her bedside table. She grabbed a tea towel from the counter and began wiping the hot coffee off her legs.

"Let me get that," Sirius said. With a flick of his wand, the coffee mess was cleaned up and the mug was repaired. With another flick, he refilled the mug with the rest of the coffee in the French press.

"Thanks," Hermione said, staring at a man who had died twenty-five years ago. "Who are you?" This man standing in her kitchen couldn't possibly be Sirius Black.

Sirius grinned lopsidedly. "You've forgotten me already, kitten? Sirius Orion Black, at your service." He bowed low and courtly.

Hermione scowled. "Don't call me kitten. I meant, what are you doing here? How are you alive? Have you been alive all this time?"

"Well, technically, I'm not alive? Or rather, I haven't been? It's confusing. What do you know of Magical Guardians?" Sirius pointed his wand at the kettle on the cooker, and Hermione watched as it filled with water and began to boil. She picked up the French press and cleaned it out, it was only meant to hold two cups of coffee, and clearly, Sirius needed some too.

"I don't think I've ever heard…well, shit," Hermione realized the translation she had been working on the night before.

"Yes, kitten?"

"Seriously, I'm not a teenager anymore. Don't call me that. Wait, do you know who I am?" It had occurred to her that maybe Sirius didn't know it was her. Didn't he remember that when he called her by that nickname it would rile her up? If he'd forgotten about that, then hopefully he'd forgotten about the massive crush she once had on him. Sometimes, Hermione thought she was more upset with Sirius's death than Harry. She'd spent the summer after his death healing from her wounds, and crying over Sirius. It had been a terrible holiday.

"Of course I do, Hermione Jean Granger-Weasley." Sirius grinned at her. "Divorced from Ronald Bilius Weasley, mother of Rose 'Rosie' Jean Granger-Weasley, and of Hugo Arthur Granger-Weasley."

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. How could he possibly know all that?

"I'm  _your_  Magical Guardian," Sirius answered as if he'd read her mind.

"What? I don't need a Magical Guardian!"

"Maybe not." He shrugged. "But you did call for me. Didn't you?"

That Irish phrase from the book yesterday; it had said something about Magical Guardians.

"Maybe." She moved to pass Sirius, heading to the kitchen table and her bag on top of it. Sirius didn't move out of her way, and she had to brush past his body. Hermione tried to control her blush as their shoulders touched. She was forty-two for crying out loud. She stopped in her tracks when she suddenly realized she was still dressed in her night clothes, a skimpy camisole and sleeping shorts, then changed her course for her bedroom. She'd just throw a robe on.

As she reached for her robe on a hook behind the door, Sirius leaned against the door frame.

"Cute cottage," he said casually.

Hermione jumped, not realizing he had followed her.

"Magical Guardian or not, I deserve some privacy," she snapped at him as she pulled the warm flannel robe over her meager night clothes.

Sirius dragged his eyes up and down her body. "But I like the other view better," he said. Then he turned away and headed down the short corridor back to the kitchen.

Hermione's face reddened. Had he just complimented her looks? She shook her head and followed behind him. Once back in the kitchen, she dug through her bag and pulled out the Irish dictionary and the parchment she had the night before, reading it over.

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you see me through the Grey?

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo._

Come through the

"Yep, that would do it," Sirius said as he read over her shoulder. "That last line is 'Come through the veil, come to the living.'"

Hermione turned her head to look at him and realized their faces were within kissing distance. Mentally, she shook herself. She shouldn't be thinking about kissing this man. There was a mystery to solve.

"You know Irish?"

"Some," Sirius replied. "Where did you find the spell?"

Hermione turned and looked back down at the parchment. Sirius tapped it with his wand, and the last line filled itself in.

_Cosantóir Draíochta, Caomhnóir Draíochta:_

Magical Protector, Magical Guardian:

_An féidir leat mé a fheiceáil tríd an Liath?_

Can you see me through the Grey?

_Tar tríd an Imbhalla, tar go dtí na daoine atá beo._

Come through the veil, come to the living.

"In a book." Hermione shrugged.

Sirius tossed his head back and laughed. "I should have expected that sort of answer from you. You always were a bit of a swot."

Hermione frowned and moved away from him. She couldn't concentrate when he was standing so near her. The crush she'd had on him as a teenager seemed to be creeping back and that terrified Hermione.

"Well, what's on the agenda for today, kitten?" Sirius asked as he poured the boiling water from the kettle into the French press.

Hermione picked up her own mug of coffee and took a sip. "I need to go to work. Read through that book and see if I can figure out a way to send you back."

"Send me back?" Sirius looked affronted. "Why would you want to do that?"

He sounded almost hurt, and Hermione cringed, she hadn't meant to hurt him.

"Well, weren't you in the afterlife or something? Why would you want to hang around swotty, old me?" She focused on her coffee, avoiding his eyes.

"No. I was in this weird misty-grey place. Then I got the call to be your Magical Guardian and jumped at the chance to be out of there. It was like purgatory or something, dull and dreadfully boring."

"Got the call? What does that mean?"

"It means I was sitting in an unimaginably boring grey space when up walked the Unseelie King. I didn't even know how long I'd been dead."

Hermione's jaw dropped. "The Unseelie King?!"

"Mmm." Sirius nodded. "Scary fucker. Anyway, he tells me he's got a call for a Magical Guardian, and I'm the man for the job. Who was I to turn him down?" Sirius grinned at her.

Hermione hadn't picked her jaw up from the floor yet. He couldn't be serious, could he?

"The Unseelie King?"

"Yes, I just said that." Sirius frowned at her.

Hermione felt like her brain was stuck. The Unseelie King was real? Not some figure of Irish mythology? "He's real?"

"Scary as hell, too," Sirius commented.

"I don't…" Hermione trailed off. It's not that she didn't want to believe Sirius. The fact that Sirius, who had died twenty-five years ago, was now standing here in front of her lent some truth to it, but her logical mind just couldn't quite wrap her head around it. "Why would the Unseelie King want to help though? Aren't the Unseelie known to be malevolent?"

"Mmm, that is a good question, kitten. I'm not sure I have an answer for it. And…" It was Sirius' turn to trail off.

"And?" Hermione prompted.

"Well, what if I'm being used in a bigger plot by the Unseelie King? That makes me nervous. I was so happy to be able to come back; I didn't think about it." Sirius shrugged and looked mildly embarrassed. Hermione was nonplussed. She didn't think Sirius  _could_  be embarrassed.

"Did he say anything else?" Hermione asked.

"Just told me what year it was, who I'd be sent to, and what being a Magical Guardian is all about. Actually, now that I think about it, this is probably your fault," Sirius said.

"I know it's my fault, dammit!" Hermione exploded. "Nine years spent going through musty old books, and one time, one freaking time, I say an incantation out loud, and this is what I wake up to." She gestured to him, disgusted with herself.

Sirius stiffened. "I see. If you don't need my services, I can leave."

Shockingly, he started fading from view.

"No! Sirius! Don't go, wait," Hermione said. She had wanted to send him back into the afterlife, but that grey misty place he was talking about couldn't possibly be the afterlife, could it? She might actually have to engage with some of her colleagues in the Death Chamber.

"Yes?" he asked, still half visible, his tone bored and unaffected. She could see her cooker through him.

"Listen, sorry. I want to help you. Wherever you were doesn't sound like the afterlife, like what Beyond the Veil is supposed to be. I'm not sure. I don't work in the Death Chamber, but I can speak with some of the other Unspeakables. Maybe we can have you move on properly."

"But I'm supposed to be your Magical Guardian." Sirius pouted.

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. "And what does that entail?"

"Well, according to the Unseelie King, it means I'm basically your slave. In whatever capacity you'll have me." The look Sirius gave Hermione was positively smoldering. She licked her lips and watched as his eyes darted to her mouth. He took a step closer to her.

"Right," Hermione said brusquely and ducked around Sirius. "I'll get ready for work, and we'll go in and see."

"See what?" Sirius called as she slammed the bathroom door.

"Merlin." Hermione breathed as she leaned back against the closed bathroom door. Whatever she felt for Sirius as a teenager seemed to have come roaring back to life. He looked positively delicious standing in her kitchen. She shook her head. He wasn't really alive. Any relationship she had with him would be moot.  _Relationship? I'm just thinking of sex,_  her inner voice whispered.

Hermione closed her eyes and tamped down her emotions. She needed to shower and get to work. Maybe that book would have some answers, and she should talk with the Unspeakables in the Death Chamber. They might know more about Beyond the Veil and whatever afterlife Sirius had been trapped in.

* * *

"You can't come with me," Hermione told him as she brushed an imaginary piece of lint from her robes, intending to Floo to the Ministry.

"Why not?" Sirius asked.

"Because you died twenty-five years ago! You'll cause a panic!"

"I can become invisible to everyone but you." He grinned at her.

"Fine. But you have to be invisible to others. And no talking!" She warned him. She was already unimaginably late, what was Aggie going to think?

"In that case, we better Floo together, right kitten?" He stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

Hermione's face flamed. "Fine," she snapped, her voice tight with both anxiety and embarrassment. She shuffled forward, and Sirius did the same. Then she dropped the Floo powder into the fireplace and shouted, "Ministry of Magic!"

In a swirl of green flames, they were spat out of the Ministry fireplace, and Hermione shuffled forward. When Sirius didn't let go, she elbowed him.

"Ouch," he complained in her ear.

"Let go so I can walk," she whispered to him.

"Alright, alright," he muttered back and placed a hand on her shoulder. Hermione started walking forward just as the Floo activated and someone else stepped out.

Hermione hustled toward the lifts.

"Take the stairs," Sirius said.

"Right." Hermione nodded and smiled to a few people she knew as she headed toward the door for the stairs.

"Stairs today, Granger?"

Hermione whirled around to see Zacharias Smith addressing her. Sirius barely kept up, and Hermione was sure Smith could see him by the way he narrowed his eyes. Smith was in the budget office and disproved of everything that cost money, including having hired Hermione to assist Aggie's research.

"Er, yes. New exercise regimen." She smiled weakly and turned back to the stairs, hurrying toward them.

"Fucking ponce," Sirius growled into her ear, and Hermione couldn't help but giggle, thankful that almost nobody else took the stairs at the Ministry, and they were alone.

"What did I say about being silent?" she hissed at him once they rounded the corner down the flight of stairs that led to the Department of Mysteries. They entered into a back corridor that was behind the Hall of Prophecy, skipping the Room of Doors entirely. It was a standard maintenance corridor and was drab and boring. Hermione counted doors until she reached the one that marked the research room.

"Merlin, how do you find your way around?" Sirius asked in amazement as Hermione opened the correct door and entered the small lobby that led to her and Aggie's offices as well as the corridor toward the storage rooms and archives.

"You get used to it," Hermione mumbled back quietly. She wanted to sneak into her office without Aggie realizing she was here. She glanced at her watch. It was almost nine-thirty, meaning she was much later than usual. Aggie probably assumed she had stayed too late the night before.

A glance told her Aggie's door was closed, and she breathed a sigh of relief as she hustled Sirius into her office and closed her own door.

Sirius promptly sat in the big swivel chair behind the desk. "Nice chair." He grinned at her as he leaned back and gave it a twirl.

Hermione rolled her eyes and turned to the bookcase next to her door. Taking down her safebox, she set it on her desk and opened it. The book was still inside, and Hermione breathed a sigh of relief. She was glad Aggie hadn't decided to take a look at it this morning. He didn't normally, but she was feeling paranoid. She levitated the book out of the box and set it on the desk.

"This it?" Sirius asked, leaning forward and reaching for the book.

"Don't touch it!" Hermione scolded him and slapped his hand with her wand. "Don't you know anything about research and magical artifacts?"

Sirius scowled at her.

"Besides, last time I touched it, I was compelled to say a magical phrase inside it, and you appeared in my cottage," Hermione muttered.

"Hey, s'alright kitten, you'll get used to me." Sirius winked at her, and Hermione bit her lip. She didn't know what it was about Sirius, but he had always held that unique ability to make her laugh.

"Right." She took a deep breath and ran a scanning spell of her own creation over the book. It looked for intent, and she wanted to tease out the compulsion charm, but the spell came back clean. "Strange," she mumbled.

"Care to enlighten me?" Sirius asked.

"There has to be some sort of compulsion spell on the book. I have never once said a phrase out loud, and yet yesterday, I did without even thinking."

"Maybe you were tired." Sirius shrugged.

Hermione shook her head, her neat braid coming apart from the fierceness of the shake. A tendril loosened and slid across her cheek, and she tucked it back behind her ear.

"No, it's never happened before. It has to be a charm, but every diagnostic and scanning spell I run on it comes back clean."

"Can I…" Sirius trailed off and gestured toward the book.

Hermione frowned but nodded. He opened the book slowly and the same as yesterday, pages and pages of it were blank.

"It was like that yesterday too. I placed my hand on it to grab my wand, and that's when the words appeared, and I was compelled to speak them."

Sirius nodded. "So you can't read anything that's written here?" He gestured to the blank page before him.

"Are you seeing writing?" Hermione asked.

"You aren't?"

"Why would you be able to see writing in the book, but I cannot? Can you read it? What does it say?"

"Well, it's mostly Irish. Which I know, but not well." Sirius frowned, and Hermione could see his lips mumbling.

"Don't!" she shouted, leaning forward and covering his mouth with her hand. "Don't say anything out loud!"

Sirius' eyes widened, and he backed away from her and the book. "Merlin, that thing's dangerous."

"I know." Hermione nodded in agreement. "Do you think it's…Merlin, this is silly, do you think it's the Unseelie King's Grimoire?"

Hermione was skeptical that such a thing could exist, but it had been whispered about for years. It was something of an urban legend in wizarding Britain and Ireland.

Sirius laughed. "That's just a myth."

"Is it?" Hermione asked with her eyebrow raised.

"Who's this then?" a voice from behind Hermione asked. She whirled around to find Aggie standing in the doorway staring over her shoulder.

"Aggie, you scared me!" Hermione smiled at him.

"Who is that Hermione?" he asked, his voice hard. Hermione gulped. What was she going to tell her boss?

"Sirius Black." Sirius stood and crossed the small room to shake Aggie's hand.

"You're dead," Aggie said flatly and refused to shake Sirius' hand.

"Not anymore." Sirius grinned brightly and slung his arm across Hermione's shoulders. "I'm her Magical Guardian."

"Her what?" Aggie looked at Hermione with accusation heavy in his eyes.

"Aggie, I can explain. And I'm going to fix it. Let's step into your office for a moment."

Aggie nodded and left. Hermione pushed Sirius' arm off her shoulder. "Stay here."

"I'm not a dog!" Sirius shouted after her as Hermione hurried out of her office and to Aggie's.


	3. The Veil and the Void

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely msmerlin and BirdieMing for their beta work! And I have been and would be remiss if I didn't thank brownlark42 for her continued assistance in being both an excellent alpha and idea-bouncer and, of course, my real life best friend. This work wouldn't be what it is without all three of these lovely ladies.**
> 
> **The good news is that this story is now complete! I'll be posting a chapter every week or so as it works it's way through my lovely beta's.**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

  _It's an art to live with pain... mix the light into grey._

_-Eddie Vedder_

* * *

_October 2021_

* * *

She walked into his office and shut the door behind her. "I know this is bad." She cast a few silencing and warding spells, not trusting Sirius to not eavesdrop on them.

"Bad? A man who has been dead for twenty-five years is walking about claiming to be your Magical Guardian. I think this moves beyond the realm of bad," Aggie spat at her.

Hermione closed her eyes. She deserved that. She wasn't a naive schoolgirl. There was no reason for her to have said that phrase aloud, to have summoned Sirius here.

"I'll fix it."

"How?"

"I'll get him sent back somehow. And I thought he was—how did you see him?"

Sirius had told her that he could make himself invisible to everyone but her, and she was sure nobody in the atrium had seen him. So how did Aggie? Did Sirius forget and become fully corporeal?

"Anti-invisibility spells on the whole floor. You know that. Not even Potter's cloak works down here. You both figured that out the hard way, remember?" Aggie reminded her. Hermione bit her lip in shame. How stupid could she be? She  _had_  known that. Everyone who worked in the department knew that.

"Right."

"He's clouding your judgment." Aggie narrowed his eyes at her. Hermione closed hers in response. Aggie was right, Sirius was clouding her judgment.

"I'll send him back," she said again, "as soon as I figure out how."

"What's in the book?" Aggie asked.

"Sirius says it's Irish. Really, it's bloody insane what he says. He says he was in a misty-grey place, and the Unseelie King sent him to be my Magical Guardian."

Whatever response she had been expecting from Aggie, it wasn't the one he gave her now. His eyes widened, and he reached out to grip her arm tightly. "Is it the Unseelie King's Grimoire? The book? "

"I-I don't know," Hermione said, and she pried Aggie's grip from her arm. She frowned at him. "Why?"

"Bloody dangerous, it is! And if that's what brought him back? Now you're mixed up with the Fae! Merlin, Circe, and Nimue, girl. It's reckless and irresponsible," Aggie raved.

"Well, it wasn't on purpose!" Hermione shouted at him. "There's some sort of compelling charm on it that made me say this stupid phrase, and then there he was pleased as punch in my fucking kitchen this morning!"

"Don't you shout at me, lassie!"

Hermione let out a breath. "Sorry, Aggie. It's not your fault. It's mine. I'll clean it up and send him back. I promise."

"You better." He glared at her. "You just better. Get out."

Hermione nodded and left his office. What a disaster.

* * *

"Bossman isn't happy?" Sirius asked as he twirled around in her office chair and stared at the ceiling.

"No," Hermione grumped, slamming her door shut behind her.

"That's too bad." Sirius shrugged.

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. "You don't seem that put out by it."

"Eh, I'm not. So did your boss figure anything out?"

"I don't think so. He's as worried as I am that this might be the Unseelie King's Grimoire." Hermione gestured at the book lying on the desk between them.

"Want me to ask him?" Sirius asked.

Hermione's jaw dropped. "You have access to the Unseelie King?"

Sirius shrugged. "I don't actually know," he frowned and rubbed his jaw, "but he's the one who brought me here. So I imagine I could call him—"

"No!" Hermione shouted, putting her arms up as if to ward him off. "No, don't go calling the Unseelie King. Merlin, don't you know how dangerous the Fae are? Especially the Unseelie?"

Sirius shrugged again.

"You don't, do you?" Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. Typical.

"No, I do. I just think you are over-cautious. The Blacks have a long history of dealing with the Fae. Actually, it's said that the original Sirius, the one from about fifty years after the first Roman invasion of England, had an affair with Mórrígan of the Tuatha Dé Danann. When a child was produced from the affair, Mórrígan gifted Sirius with the child, and Sirius raised it as his own. And that's how the Ancient and Noble House of Black began," he explained nonchalantly.

Hermione dropped heavily into her visitor chair halfway through Sirius' tale. He was related to the Tuatha Dé Danann, the gods that ruled over ancient Ireland, which meant he was descended from the Fae.  _No wonder the Blacks are so gorgeous_. She shook her head to clear those thoughts.

"Hermione?" Sirius looked concerned. "Did I break you?"

"Th-That's just a story, right?" Hermione asked.

Sirius shrugged. "Probably. But it is interesting. There are all sorts of stories like that littered through the Black family tree."

"Mórrígan?" Hermione asked. "Truly?"

"So the legend goes," Sirius said breezily.

Hermione closed her eyes and dropped her head into her hands. Her head hurt. There was too much to do. She was going to have to mess with the Fae in order to return Sirius, and she needed resources on the Fae, maybe someone who was experienced in dealing with them.

"How can you be so blasé about this? It's the Fae we're dealing with. How am I supposed to send you back?"

Sirius frowned at her. "Why do I have to go back? I just got here."

"Because you're dead. You've been dead for a quarter of a century. And you can make yourself invisible to other people, so don't go telling me you're alive again," Hermione snapped at him.

"I want to see Harry," Sirius said in a small voice.

Hermione met his gaze, and she saw pain. Why did she have to be so cruel? Rubbing in the fact he'd been dead for so long. She gulped and closed her own eyes, unable to look into his anymore.

"Sirius, that's not a good idea," she said.

"You are no fun," Sirius pouted, his playful facade back in place.

Hermione breathed a sigh of relief, even as guilt draped over her. She needed to be nicer to Sirius. He was just as stuck in this situation as she was. Her brow wrinkled as she contemplated the book lying on the desk between them. They would definitely need to speak with someone from the Death Chamber, but the last thing she wanted was to invite more people into the secret. Could she trust Sirius to stay locked in her office?

"Sirius," Hermione began.

"Yes, kitten?" Sirius asked with a small, playful smile.

"Don't call me that," Hermione scolded. "Can you stay here, and keep quiet? Don't open the door, don't talk to anyone…"

Sirius lifted his eyebrow. "I'm not actually a dog, you know."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I know, but there are anti-invisibility spells over the whole department. That's how Aggie could see you. I need to consult with some colleagues, and unless we want to cause a panic about my sudden ability to raise the dead, you need to stay a secret."

"Fine," Sirius said, sighing heavily. "I'll stay here."

"Good, I'll be back shortly." Hermione nodded firmly and left her office, shutting it tightly behind her. She cast a locking spell and a silencing charm at the door, hoping it was enough to deter Sirius.

Hermione didn't particularly care for most of the other Unspeakables she worked with and only knew one of the wizards who worked in the Death Chamber. Ethan Bole was a tall, skinny man with a rather morose face. Hermione would have never spoken to him on her own, but one day he sat with her in the Ministry canteen, and he had recognized her as a fellow Unspeakable. He looked sullen, and Hermione assumed that's who he was, but in fact, he was quite jovial. Hermione's sides had ached by the time they finished eating.

She made her way to the back corridor she and Sirius had used earlier. She hated the Room of Doors and avoided it at all costs. Counting as she went, she opened the hidden door to the offices located behind the Death Chamber.

"Hermione!" Ethan called cheerily from his office as soon as she knocked on the door.

"Hi, Ethan." She smiled at the man who extended his hand to shake hers.

"Come in, come in." He gestured to the chair in front of his desk. "What brings you by?"

Hermione took a deep breath. She'd been contemplating what she'd ask him on her walk over. Should she ask about the afterlife? About Beyond the Veil?

"What can you tell me about the afterlife?" Hermione settled on.

Ethan pursed his lips. "Hmm, well, there are lots of theories, and little research available to the public."

"I'm more interested in what's not available to the public," Hermione told him.

"I'm guessing you won't tell me why?"

Hermione shook her head. "Maybe someday. Not today though."

Ethan nodded and sat silent for a moment. Hermione twisted her hands nervously. She knew that the research most Unspeakables did was not for public consumption, but that didn't mean they knew anything more than the public did. Or that Ethan would share that with her.

"The Greeks had it about right," Ethan said finally.

"What do you mean?"

"Elysium is about as close as we can come to describing the afterlife for most souls, which we call Beyond the Veil. Tartarus is where someone like the Dark Lord's soul would have gone. We call that the Void."

"So no misty-grey place?" Hermione asked.

Ethan's eyes snapped to hers, and he frowned. "I've not heard of such a place. Why do you ask?"

Hermione pursed her lips. "I can't tell you that."

"I see."

Hermione sat for a moment in thought. If Sirius hadn't been in the afterlife, where had he been?

"What happens when someone goes Beyond the Veil?" Hermione pointed to the room behind him.

"You mean if someone was pushed through the Veil? Like Sirius Black was all those years ago?"

Hermione swallowed hard. She was sure Ethan didn't actually know the truth, but she still felt as if she were playing with fire. She nodded.

"You were there that night, weren't you?" Ethan's eyes narrowed.

Hermione nodded again. "But I had been taken out of the action before that happened. I didn't see it."

"Well, they quite literally go Beyond the Veil. It's a door directly into the Veil, or into Elysium."

"Not the Void? Not some—some waiting area? Like purgatory first?"

"From our research, no, but the afterlife is still a mysterious thing. If someone's soul was damaged enough, it could put them into the Void. We haven't seen that happen though."

Hermione nodded. She didn't think Sirius was in the Void. He'd never murdered anyone, and he'd gone to his death with a clear conscious as far as she knew, but she'd have to ask him.

"Thanks, Ethan." Hermione smiled at her friend.

"You will tell me what this is about one day, yes?"

Hermione nodded.

"Good." Ethan smiled at her, and she left his office with more to think about than ever. 

* * *

Hermione returned to her office to find Sirius reading the book. There were words present, and he was taking notes on a piece of parchment to the side of the book.

"What are you doing?" Hermione asked, shutting her door and rushing forward, worried he would damage the book or unleash something more horrific.

"Reading," Sirius muttered and trailed his hand along the page of the book to keep his place as he turned to the parchment and began writing once more.

"What's it say?" Hermione asked.

"It's slow going, but I'm trying to translate what I can for you."

"Really?" Hermione was surprised. She could see a bored Sirius reading the book because he had nothing better to do, but translating it for her seemed like a step above.

"Yes." Sirius finally looked up at her. "I'm your Magical Guardian, you want this book translated, so that's what I'm doing."

"Oh," Hermione responded. "I didn't know it worked like that. I didn't mean to compel you."

"You didn't, but I'm not stupid, kitten." Sirius grinned when she scowled at his pet name for her. "You won't rest until you figure out this mystery," he pointed to himself, "so I'm helping." He shrugged. "Although, why you don't just enjoy the mystery is beyond me," he said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Oh, honestly." Hermione rolled her eyes and crossed her arms in front of her chest. She was trying to keep from laughing. It was no use encouraging his antics.

He turned back to the book, and Hermione stepped around to read what he had translated so far. It was all about guardians and the afterlife. And something called the Grey. Her brows furrowed in concentration, and she looked at the book. It was written in a mixture of Ancient Runes and Irish and her eyebrows shot up in surprise. Sirius was translating from both Ancient Runes and Irish at the same time, almost seamlessly, that was impressive.

"How far have you gotten?" she asked him.

"About a page and a half." He let out a snort of frustration.

"You're doing well," she encouraged. "But move to the other side of the desk, yeah? I have other things to work on while you do that."

"Demanding," Sirius complained even as he moved the book around and sat in the visitor's chair.

The end of the day arose, and Hermione had got caught up on most of her other parchmentwork, finishing classifying the rest of the items from the Selwyn estate. Sirius had made a decent headway through the book, having a whole scroll of parchment filled with translations. Hermione moved to grab it, but Sirius stopped her.

"It'll be better if we discuss it with the book present. Leave it here for the night."

Hermione frowned. She knew he was right, knowing she wasn't taking a book that was possibly the Unseelie King's Grimoire home to her cottage. Home. Shit, how was she going to get Sirius out of the Department of Mysteries? He'd become invisible once they were out of the department but that counted on getting out of the department without being seen.

"Stay here a moment," Hermione said before ducking out. Aggie was in his office, but she wasn't worried about him. She opened the door to the back hallway and found the coast was clear before she hustled back to her office and grabbed Sirius' hand pulling him after her.

"If you wanted to hold my hand, kitten, you should have just asked," Sirius joked.

"Don't call me that," Hermione muttered absentmindedly as she guided him to the back corridor. She checked one more time to see that it was empty before hurrying Sirius down the corridor and toward the stairs. As soon as they were on the stairs, she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Alright, your invisibility should be working again. Hold onto my shoulder. We'll be going through the Atrium to use the Floo."

"I'll—"

Hermione held up her hand to cut him off. "I'm done with the innuendos for today, okay?"

Sirius frowned but nodded and placed his right hand on her right shoulder. Hermione turned from him, unable to get that puppy-dog look out of her mind. He looked so sad that she didn't want to joke around with him. She steeled herself against those feelings though. Those feelings were very dangerous. Sirius was not alive, and she could not allow herself to get to close to him.

* * *

Hermione cooked pasta for dinner and was shocked when Sirius ate it all, maybe he was more alive than she was giving him credit for. He was corporeal enough to need food. But did he eat for fulfillment or because he and she both expected him to? She wasn't sure how she felt about running any sort of experiment on him to find out. If he  _did_  need to eat and she experimented on him, then it was torture. Did it matter in the long run? She was still planning on figuring out a way to send him to the afterlife. Apparently, she couldn't send him through the Veil. He'd done that trip once already, and wherever he'd ended up wasn't the afterlife, if Ethan was to be believed. And she did have to believe Ethan, because if she didn't, then she had no logical leg to stand on.

Her small cottage had a second bedroom, but Sirius took one look at it and decided he'd kip on the couch.

"Are you sure?"

Sirius removed his wand and transfigured the couch into a small bed. "I'm a whiz at Transfiguration. Couch is fine for me, kitten."

Hermione glared at him. She'd been correcting him all day. Perhaps if she ignored it, he'd stop.

"I'll be fine," Sirius assured her. Hermione nodded and headed to her bedroom. It had been an exhausting day.

She got ready for bed and tried to shut her mind down, but all she had going through her mind were thoughts of Sirius and the afterlife and the notes he'd taken from the book. She really, really hoped that it wasn't the Unseelie King's Grimoire, but the look on Sirius' face at the end of the day made her suspect that he'd found something to suggest it was. Climbing into bed, she doused the lights out with her wand. She was tired enough that it didn't take long before she was out.

* * *

"Wake up, Hermione!" Someone was whispering at her. She mumbled something intelligible and rolled over.

"Come on, get up!" the voice said again.

Recognizing his voice was like a glass of water to the face, and Hermione sat up fast. It was still dark out, and Sirius was standing over her with his wand lit dimly.

"Sirius?"

"Oh good, you're awake."

"Because you woke me up, you idiot," Hermione hissed, reaching for her wand.

She lit her bedside lamp and found Sirius looking almost manic as he paced her bedroom.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked.

"I had a dream," he began. "But it wasn't really a dream. It was more like...I think it was dream-walking. Do you know what that is?"

Hermione nodded and motioned for him to continue. Dream-walking was similar to what Muggles called astral projection. If someone was dream-walking, they could see other people's dreams or other events. It was a very indistinct area of magic, like Divination.

"Right, I was dream-walking, and I was back in that grey-misty place. Except, this time, I wasn't alone! James was there, and Lily, and Remus! Dumbledore too and loads of others. They were all just milling around in this same place that I was before."

"Did you talk to anyone?" Hermione asked. She wasn't sure if what Sirius experienced was really dream-walking. It would be the first time he'd slept in over twenty years. It was possible that it was only his imagination.

"Of course I did! I went up to everyone I recognized and talked to them, but it was weird. Dora wasn't there, neither was Ted. Or Fred, or Snape, or Pettigrew. It's like some dead people were there, but not all of them. And…this is going to sound insane, I know, but I think Grindelwald was there."

"Was Voldemort?" Hermione asked sharply. Could this have something to do with the Horcruxes?

"I didn't see him, in either of his incarnations."

"Do you really think you were dream-walking?" Hermione asked gently.

"I don't feel rested. I feel like I've been awake for ages. I…some of the things James talked about, it's… It's like we were all in this grey-misty place by ourselves. James said the same thing to me, that he'd been alone for so many years, and now suddenly, we're all together. Or they are all together, I guess. I'm here. Do…do you think it has to do with the Unseelie King?"

Hermione swallowed hard. "I think it has to do with me calling you back here," she said quietly.

"Well, I have to say, that dull, misty place is boring. It's just grey—"

"Is it the Grey?" Hermione asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I was looking over your notes, and there was a lot of talk about something called the Grey." Hermione shrugged.

"Maybe." Sirius looked unsure and sat down on the edge of her bed. Hermione drew her feet up to make room for him. "I want to go back. I want to see James again, and Remus."

Hermione smiled sadly at him. "I promise to send you back. I have to."

"But at the same time, I want to stay here," Sirius said and caught her gaze. His grey eyes swirled with an emotion she didn't recognize. "I want to see Harry, at least once."

"Okay," Hermione said, exhaling loudly. "We can see Harry, but I don't think it's a good idea if he sees you."

Sirius nodded in agreement.

"Think you'll be able to go back to sleep?" Hermione asked, trying to suppress a yawn.

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I can try." He got up and left her room, closing the door quietly. Hermione laid in bed for a long time, thinking about everything Sirius had said. 

* * *

_November 2021_

* * *

The door to Grimmauld Place swung open. "Hermione!" Harry shouted.

"Hi, Harry." She grinned at her friend and gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek.

"How come I don't get kisses on the cheek," Sirius grumbled from behind her.

Hermione's smile tightened as she tried to ignore him. He'd promised to stay invisible and keep his comments to a minimum, so far, he was not off to a good start. Sirius had been back in the land of the living for over two weeks now, and they weren't any closer to figuring out a way to send him back. He was dream-walking to the Grey almost nightly. Hermione had tried to keep him from going, telling him he needed his sleep, but it was like he couldn't stop himself from seeing James and Remus. And truly, how was Hermione to begrudge that?

"Hermione!" Ginny cried as she too entered the entryway of Grimmauld Place.

"Should have known he would go for the redhead, just like his father," Sirius said.

Hermione gritted her teeth to keep from kicking him. "How are you?" she asked Ginny instead.

"Good, good. Let's go to the kitchen. I'm almost finished."

"Butterbeer, 'Mione?" Harry offered as they made their way down the short set of stairs to the kitchen.

"I'm loving what they've done with the place," Sirius said, gazing around at all the changes made to his childhood home. This was easier for Hermione to ignore.

Dinner with Harry and Ginny turned out to be pretty brutal for Hermione. She kept biting her tongue every time Sirius decided to make a comment. On top of that, he stole food from her plate when Harry and Ginny weren't looking. She didn't know how the rules of invisibility worked for him. Did the food go invisible when he touched it or after he put it in his mouth? She didn't know, and he was driving her nuts with it all.

"Blimey, 'Mione, you were hungry, eh?" Harry laughed, seeing more food disappear from her plate.

Hermione smiled. "I skipped lunch today. I've been working on closing out the last few items from the Selwyn estate. I'm almost finished." She aimed a kick at Sirius.

"What? I'm hungry, witch!" Sirius complained.

Ginny stood and began clearing the table.

"Let me help, Gin," Harry said and began piling dishes up to take to the sink.

"Would you stop?" Hermione whispered to Sirius. "You can eat when we get home." She stood from the table, intending to help Harry and Ginny clear it.

"What was that?" Ginny asked, and Hermione whirled around to find Ginny standing right behind her.

"Oh, nothing, just commenting on the lovely home you found for that painting Molly gave you at Christmas," Hermione covered, pointing at the hideous painting of a meadow Ginny had hung in the corner of the kitchen.

Sirius snorted. "I like the way you said home, kitten."

"Oh." Ginny laughed. "I hid that hideous thing in here so most people wouldn't have to look at it."

"Right." Hermione smiled. "Well, thanks again for dinner, I hate to cut the evening short, but I have to get up early in the morning."

"Aw, come on," Sirius whined. "Please let's stay a bit longer."

"Understandable." Harry smiled, returning from the sink. "I'll walk you out."

"Dinner was lovely," Hermione told Ginny and gave her a hug.

"Don't be a stranger." Ginny returned the hug.

Harry held out his arm, and Hermione laughed as she took it. "Everything okay?" he asked, concerned for one of his oldest friends.

"Yeah," Hermione said tiredly. "Just busy at work. You know how I get during the school year."

Harry chuckled. "I do know. It's why I insist on these bi-weekly dinners. I think it's the only way to get you out of the DoM."

Hermione smiled but didn't say anything. She didn't regret divorcing Ron, but she did regret that she spent most months out of the year alone. Maybe once she got this mess with Sirius cleaned up, she could attempt to date again.

"Thanks again, Harry. You're a good friend," Hermione said, hugging him.

"He looks so much like James," Sirius said sadly once they walked out of Grimmauld Place and onto the path out front.

"Yeah," Hermione agreed, even though she'd only ever seen photos of James. She gripped Sirius' arm and Apparated them home.


	4. Sirius Holidays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely msmerlin and BirdieMing for their beta work! Some asked last time how many chapters, and this story will be 12 chapters total, clocking in at about 42k words.**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_Her sadness_

_is like the_

_grey clouds_

_floating above her_

_waiting for the rain_

_to fall_

_to heal her pain_

_-Mandy Jean_

* * *

_December 2021_

* * *

Hermione groaned when her alarm charm sounded. She'd stayed up too late again, chatting with Sirius about why he was still around and why they couldn't find any of the answers they were looking for. Worse still, today was the first day of Christmas holidays for her children. She didn't know what she was going to do with Sirius. It wasn't as though she could leave the couch a transfigured bed like they had been doing. Sirius had suggested moving into her bedroom, and Hermione was reluctant, but short of leaving him locked in her office at the Department of Mysteries, what else could she do?

Reaching out blindly, she grabbed her wand and flicked it to release the charm. She wasn't ready to get up yet. She snuggled back into bed, knowing it would go off again in fifteen minutes. That was all she needed, another fifteen minutes.

She received five.

"Hermione! You awake? I heard your alarm." Sirius burst into her room and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling the quilt Hermione had thrown over her head down.

"Seriously?"

"Ah-ah, what have we said about that word?" Hermione could hear the smirk in his voice even though her shut eyes.

"I'm sleeping."

"Your alarm went off."

"Merlin, it's like having a puppy."

"I'm not a dog." Now she could hear the frown in his voice.

"Then don't act like one," Hermione snapped.

She instantly regretted it when Sirius rose from the bed and left the room. Circe, she hoped the rest of her day wouldn't go like this. Groaning, she threw back the covers and got out of bed. She walked down the hall to the living area to see Sirius standing at the stove, frying bacon.

"Sirius," Hermione said. He didn't turn to look at her. He could be as childish as Ron sometimes. "Listen, I didn't mean it. I'm tired. We stayed up way too late last night and as excited as I am to see Rose and Hugo, I'm also nervous as hell. What if they discover you?"

"Well, aren't they going to Ron's later?" Sirius asked reasonably.

Hermione nodded. He knew they were. She would get them for the first part of the week, through Christmas Day. Then Ron would get them from Boxing Day until they went back to school.

"There you go, only a week to hide me as your dirty little secret. You're so naughty." Sirius waved the spatula at her and cocked his hip.

Hermione laughed and turned to head for the shower. They had a lot to get done around the cottage before she picked the kids up at the train station later this afternoon.

* * *

"Then Albus and Scorpius did this thing on their brooms where…" Hermione lost track of what Hugo was saying as she pulled Rose from her beau, a somewhat spotty Hufflepuff.

"You'll see him in a few weeks, Rose," Hermione reminded her daughter gently. She was not ready for her daughter to be dating and was quite shocked to see Rose leave the train holding someone's hand.

Rose sighed heavily. "I know, but I'm just going to miss Scott so much though."

"It's okay dear. We'll keep you busy."

"No playing kissy-face—" Hugo began.

"Shut it!" Rose shouted at her brother, her face reddening, and she smacked the back of his head.

"Hugo, be nice to your sister. You'll be going through it soon enough. Rose, no hitting your brother," Hermione scolded, completely missing the byplay of her children sticking their tongues out at each other as she guided them toward the hearth room in the back corner of the platform so they could Floo back to her cottage.

A short queue later and they were home. Hermione breathed a sigh of relief when Sirius padded down the hall to her bedroom without a word. She'd been worried at the train station, but it didn't seem as if anyone could see him. If they had, they certainly hadn't commented on it. As soon as they were home, the children ran to their shared room, bickering and beginning to unpack for their short stay.

Hermione went to the kitchen to begin making dinner and opened a bottle of wine while she was at it. She loved her children, but they were much less stressful after Hermione had a glass of wine.

"Do I get a glass?" a low, deep voice asked from behind her.

Hermione held back her shriek and whirled around to find Sirius standing almost directly behind her. She put a hand on his chest and pushed him back, then leaned around him to see if either Rose or Hugo had left their room.

"Don't worry. They're squabbling over the top bunk." Sirius grinned. "Sounds like Rose is winning. So about that glass…" He pointed to the bottle of wine on the counter.

Hermione rolled her eyes and Summoned another wine glass for him.

"Take it to the bedroom," she hissed quietly.

"Naughty." Sirius winked at her and sauntered down the short hallway back to her bedroom.

Sweet Nimue, how was she going to share a room with that man for a week? Just that tiny interaction had her heart racing and her palms sweaty. She'd never felt more like a teenager with a terrible crush than she had in the last few months since Sirius had been living with her. She needed to find a way to send him back. Taking a long sip of her wine, she set to work making dinner.

It had been a rambunctious affair, and when she set the kids to picking out a board game to play afterward, Hermione surreptitiously sent a plate of food back to her bedroom for Sirius. At some point during dinner, he must have left the bedroom because when Hermione went to refill her wine glass, the bottle was gone. She pursed her lips and got a glass of water instead. Better not have too much wine before she had to share her room later.

Rose and Hugo had tired her out over endless rounds of Catan. She desperately wanted to go to bed but was putting it off by making a casserole for the morning. She'd taken the week off work so she could spend it with her kids, but now she was beginning to regret it. At least at work, she could make Sirius sit in her office while Hermione researched in the archives. Space. That's what Hermione desperately needed. Space from Sirius, especially.

"Ever planning to come to bed?" Sirius asked, startling Hermione for the second time that night.

"Merlin, you need a bell," Hermione muttered. She picked up her wand and cast a Muffliato over the kitchen.

"What are you doing out of the bedroom?" Hermione asked. Her tone harsher and more accusatory than she intended.

Sirius pursed his lips and held the dinner plate she had sent his way aloft. "Thought I'd do some washing up."

"Right." Hermione snatched the plate from him and put it in the sink. Then she turned back to the casserole she was making. "You can go now."

She didn't hear anything else except for the small pop indicating the Muffliato had broken. Chancing a look over her shoulder, she was relieved to see Sirius gone. Hermione closed her eyes for a moment, knowing she was being a coward. She just couldn't seem to be able to stop herself.

Thirty minutes later, the kitchen was spotless and the casserole was in the fridge. She tiptoed down the hallway and eased her bedroom door open. Sirius was lying on her bed, his back to her, and Hermione scowled. They had discussed him transfiguring a cot, and here he was pleased as punch, lying in her bed under the covers. Would it be strange if she conjured a cot to sleep on? How likely was it for Hugo or Rose to come into her room anyway? Though if they did, it would be very difficult to explain why she was sleeping on a cot instead of her bed. She sighed. She would just have to sleep in the bed. Hopefully, Sirius didn't snore.

Stepping further into the room, she closed the door behind her and cast a silencing charm that Molly had taught her when she had Rose. It allowed sounds to pass through the barrier of the spell, but not leave. It was a handy charm for babies, and Hermione figured it would give her some warning if Rose or Hugo decided they needed to come into her room in the middle of the night.

"Sirius?" she asked quietly. She wondered if he was truly asleep. He didn't answer her, so he must have been.

She changed hurriedly into a set of flannel pajamas and crawled into the other side of the bed. She didn't know if she would even be able to sleep next to this man. She didn't know if it was because it was Sirius— _probably_ —or because she hadn't slept with any man since her divorce. She took a deep breath and his scent washed over her, a hint of mint from his toothpaste, leather, and a spicy smell that was all Sirius. She groaned and turned to her side, facing away from him. She was never going to get to sleep.

* * *

Hermione woke in the morning to someone rubbing her back lightly. It felt really good. The pressure increased slightly, and she stretched, lifting her arms above her head and arching her back.

"Mmm, that's nice," Hermione mumbled.

"Glad you think so, kitten," Sirius whispered.

Hearing Sirius' voice broke her out of the half-sleep she was in like she'd been hit in the face with an Aguamenti spell.

"Merlin," Hermione breathed and sat up and away from Sirius' roaming hands quickly. "You were supposed to sleep on a cot," Hermione scolded him but didn't turn to look back at him. She knew her face was flaming and didn't want to give him any more ammunition. She didn't know why it suddenly felt like Sirius was her adversary, instead of her co-conspirator as it had in the last few weeks.

"And what would your darling children have said if they walked in and saw a cot on the floor of their mum's bedroom?"

"Right." Hermione nodded. He wasn't wrong. She'd thought the same thing last night. "I'm getting the casserole in and then getting in the shower."

"Should we shower together?" Sirius suggested and Hermione froze. "We'd save water, and that way your kids wouldn't wonder about two showers."

"That's what silencing spells are for," Hermione snapped as she stood from the bed and left the room without further acknowledgment.

Sirius' comment about showering together had put the naughtiest of images in Hermione's head, and now it was all she could think about. What his body would look like as the water slid down it. His corded forearms as he lifted her to wrap her legs around… She shook her head. That was unproductive and dangerous.

Hermione turned the oven on for the casserole and put on the kettle for coffee and tea before heading back to her bedroom. She paused to listen at the door of the room Hugo and Rose shared and only heard silence. She smiled, glad that they were still asleep.

When she got back to her room, Sirius was in the bathroom. She could hear him humming in the shower. The silencing charm she'd put up the night before seemed to be working, as she hadn't heard the shower running in the hallway. She picked up her wand and flicked it, making the bed. Then she sat down at her vanity table and began leafing through one of the books she had brought home for the week. She'd gone as far as she could in her research of the afterlife and had begun pulling Fae resources. Eventually, she would need to speak with an expert, but she'd been putting it off for the last few weeks. She'd seek out the expert she had in mind after the holidays.

* * *

"Please, mum! Stay for dinner this year?" Hugo asked, and Hermione almost said yes. She hated disappointing her children, but Molly had outright ignored her in Diagon Alley just the week before. She wasn't about to put herself in the line of fire needlessly. She'd have to see them all at the Potters' New Year's Eve party instead.

"Not this year, hun. I've got so much to do with Grandpa and Grandmum," Hermione said as she handed Rose her scarf. "I'll help you both Floo over, but then I've got to get back. You'll have fun though! Your cousins and siblings will be there!" Hermione managed to hold her smile at siblings, though the idea of Ron's other children bothered her.

"Besides, doesn't little Art want to know all about Hogwarts? You'll have to regale both him and Vra," Hermione assured Hugo. "They'll want to hear all about your second year, and you haven't seen them since the summer."

Rose rolled her eyes. "If Stepmum lets them out of her sight," she muttered under her breath.

Hermione frowned at her daughter. She knew Rose didn't care for Romilda, and she hoped her dislike wasn't rubbing off on her daughter, but when she made comments like that, she feared that it was.

"Don't say that, Rose. Romilda is a wonderful mother," Hermione said. "Now say hello to your Grandma Molly for me, alright?"

She gathered her children to her and the three of them traveled by Floo together to the Burrow. The sitting room was a madhouse, and Hermione caught Ron's eye from across the room.

"'Mione!" he shouted and rose to greet his children.

"Hello Ron," Hermione said as she began uncoating each of her kids. The coats weren't necessary for the Floo, but it had snowed on Christmas, and she was sure the children would be going outside during their stay. She handed them to Ron. "Have a good Christmas?"

"Yep." Ron grinned and bounced on his feet. "Aren't you staying?"

"Not this year, I've got a thing with my mum," Hermione said. "In fact, I'm late. Sorry, we couldn't get here earlier. You know how they fight over the bathroom," Hermione said with a laugh as she watched the Weasley cousins come to swarm Rose and Hugo. Even if she had regrets about her marriage to Ron, not only had it given her her children, but it had also given her children this amazing, loving family to be a part of. Hermione felt tears prick the back of her eyes and she turned back to a Ron.

"See you in a few days at Harry's," she said with a little wave before she was gone.

Her cottage was blissfully quiet when she returned home from the Burrow. She poured herself a glass of wine and sat down on the couch, enjoying the peace.

"They're great kids," Sirius commented from the doorway to the kitchen, a half-full wine glass in his own hand.

Hermione smiled faintly. "They are, aren't they?"

Sirius came over to sit next to her on the couch.

"You did a good job with them."

Hermione felt herself blush.  _Merlin, this man always did that to her._

"Thanks," she muttered as she took another sip of her wine, hiding her face in the glass.

Sirius laid his arm over the back of the couch, and Hermione took that as her cue.

"Well, you're probably tired. I should be off to bed anyway. Early start tomorrow," she rambled. Then drained her wine glass and disappeared behind her door.

* * *

New Year's Eve meant the annual party at the Potters. Hermione usually looked forward to it. It was one of the few times that every member of the DA got together, and it was wonderful to see everyone. She was somewhat dreading it this year however, knowing that Sirius would insist on coming along. She just hoped she could keep her wits about her so she wouldn't give Sirius up to anyone. Luckily, Grimmauld Place would be packed enough that nobody would likely notice that she'd taken to talking to herself.

She pulled the dress she'd bought for this occasion out of the closet and wondered if it was a little too sexy. This was the one event that she let herself spend a little more money than normal on a new dress every year, and she'd bought this dress last month. It was silver sequined and cut low enough in both the front and the back that she couldn't wear a bra with it. Pursing her lips, Hermione contemplated wearing the same dress she wore last year, but it was a boring black number.

Shaking her head, she decided that her motivations for buying the sexier dress didn't matter. She had never worn the same dress to the New Year's Eve party, and she wasn't going to start this year. That would be a surefire way to get Ginny on her back, and Hermione did everything she could to keep Ginny and her matchmaking away from her.

"Wow," Sirius breathed when Hermione exited her bedroom for the first time since she'd closeted herself in there several hours earlier.

"It's not too…much?" Hermione asked, fingering the A-line skirt of the dress.

"Merlin, no. You look bloody gorgeous," Sirius said with a smile. He stood from his place at the couch and walked toward her. Hermione held her breath as he walked a slow circle around her, taking her in from every angle.

"Are you meeting someone there?" he asked. His voice sounded strangely tight.

Hermione shook her head. "But if I dress to impress, Ginny leaves me alone."

Sirius' lips twitched. "Likes matchmaking like her mum, eh?"

Hermione laughed. "She does."

"Am I allowed to escort you then?" Sirius asked, his eyes brightened. He sounded so hopeful, Hermione's heart cracked at the question.

"I didn't think I'd be able to keep you away," she admitted.

"'Course you couldn't." Sirius squared his shoulders and smirked.

"Shall we then?" Hermione asked, holding the front door open. Sirius looped his arm through hers and led them to the Apparition point at the end of the path.

When they landed across the street from Grimmauld Place, Sirius breathed a sigh of relief. Hermione watched his face closely as he took in the bright lights and sounds of a party coming from his old house.

"I've never seen it like this," he whispered with awe.

"Harry and Ginny have really made it into a home," Hermione said.

When they made their way inside the house, it was packed with dozens of people Hermione knew from her school days.

"Stick close, and don't reveal yourself to anyone," Hermione told Sirius under her breath as she handed her coat off to Ginny and began the rounds of greeting people.

It was an hour or so into the party when Hermione found herself and Sirius alone, leaning against a wall in the library, watching the dancing.

"Wish I could go dance," Sirius muttered and lifted his glass of Firewhisky.

"Nobody is stopping you." Hermione shrugged. Sirius' mood seemed to have taken a morose turn as the night wore on.

"Nobody can see me. Therefore, I have no partner. Except you, kitten," he said the last with a smirk.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Don't call me kitten, Sirius. I'm not a teenager anymore. It was cute and endearing then. Now, I just find it patronizing."

"Oh, but you're so cute," Sirius gushed, "like a kitten… kitten." He grinned at her broadly.

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm forty-two! Not a kitten!"

"So?" Something seemed to dawn on him because he brightened considerably. "Oh, I'm only thirty-seven." A shocked look crossed his face. "You're no kitten." He grinned widely. "You're a cougar!"

"And what younger man am I dating?" Hermione harrumphed, desperate to hide her grin.

"Me, of course." Sirius smirked at her. "Cougar."

Hermione tried to hold it in, she really did, but she couldn't help the snort of laughter that bubbled up.

"What's so funny?" Harry asked, sidling up to Hermione.

"Cougar," Sirius whispered to her, and Hermione struggled to rein in her laughter and answer Harry at the same time.

"Neville was dancing, and…" she trailed off as she realized Neville wasn't even on the dance floor. "Huh, he seems to have gone now."

Harry narrowed his eyes at her. "Are you alright, Hermione?" He leaned closer to smell her breath. "Are you drunk?"

Hermione let loose another giggle as Sirius placed his hand on her hip and whispered into her ear again.

"Maybe a wee bit drunk," Hermione admitted with a wink.

Harry laughed. "Well, it looks good on you."

Hermione slung an arm around Harry and pulled him close. "It's good to see you, Harry."

"Don't go getting maudlin on me now." Harry grinned at her, releasing himself from her grip.

"Promise," Hermione said solemnly.

"Good." Harry grinned and bussed her cheek before moving away to talk to someone else.

"He's a good lad." Sirius nodded after Harry.

"He's also older than you," Hermione reminded him. "Can he still be called a lad then?"

"Technicalities. I was still born before you all."

Hermione snorted and took another sip of her champagne, turning her gaze to the rest of the room once more. She waved at George who was dancing quite energetically with Angelina.

"You look nice tonight," Ron said, startling Hermione.

"Hi, Ron. Thanks." She smiled at him, then turned back to the crowd. She didn't really want to be drawn into a conversation with Ron. He was rarely alone, even if he was Romilda would be by soon. And Romilda disliked Hermione with an intense passion.

"How are you?" Ron asked, peering at her.

She avoided his gaze and nodded. "I'm good."

"Want me to get rid of him?" Sirius asked. "Just tap your foot if it's a yes."

Hermione fought to keep her face pleasant and kicked Sirius' shin.

"Me too," Ron said. "Listen, I just wanted—"

"There you are, Ron!" Romilda shouted from halfway across the room.

"Your wife is looking for you." Hermione nodded to Romilda who was bustling her way over.

"Yeah," Ron replied. "It was good seeing you."

"You too." Hermione smiled at him as he turned to make his way toward his wife.

"She doesn't like you much, does she?" Sirius whispered as they both watched Romilda glare daggers at her over Ron's shoulder.

"Nope. She'll always be number two. And she can't quite get over that."

Sirius' hand on her hip tightened momentarily before he let go. "I'm going to grab another drink. You want one?"

Hermione shook her head, and Sirius left her standing by herself.


	5. Fae

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely msmerlin and BirdieMing for their beta work! This is a few hours later than expected as I accidentally set my kitchen on fire! Whoops! No damage was done and everything is ok. Except for my poor heart which had a few years shaved off, haha. Bonus - we went out to eat instead! Downside - took me an hour and then some to clean up all the fire extinguisher dust! So here's a good reminder - have a fire extinguisher or two in your house! You never know when you'll need them!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_We are all somewhere or the other a little grey, not black and white. We have our imperfections._  - Kriti Sanon

* * *

_March 2022_

* * *

"I dream-walked again last night," Sirius said in lieu of good morning as he took his seat at the table.

Hermione frowned and handed him a plate of toast. "Was it different? Or the same?"

Sirius had been back for just over six months, and he seemed to dream-walk most nights. Most of the time, the experiences didn't seem to vary. He'd see the Grey, then he'd spend some time with James and Remus. He would almost always awaken tired. Hermione had wondered if Dreamless Sleep would help, but Sirius was reluctant to try.

"Different," he shuddered and took a bite of toast.

"How so?" Hermione asked as she settled herself across the table from him, sipping at her tea.

"I think it's shrinking." He frowned. "And the magic there is strange."

"You can do magic in the Grey?" That was news to Hermione and not something she had contemplated.

"I am a wizard, love." Sirius grinned at her, and Hermione's heart pitter-pattered. She quelled the emotions rolling through her. Over the months, Sirius' flirting had elevated, and Hermione was finding it harder and harder to maintain any sort of boundary between them. She wouldn't go so far as to say she was in love with him, but she was afraid that if she truly let herself, she could fall in love very easily.

"It's the first I've thought about it. Can you do magic because you have a wand? Or can everyone do magic?" she asked and promptly hid her face in her tea mug.

"Everyone can, although not all of them have wands. Dumbledore doesn't, but I've seen him use magic," Sirius said around a bite of toast.

"Is the magic causing the destabilization?"

"Hadn't thought of that," he grunted, mulling over her words. Hermione was content to let him. These moments of casual intimacy were the hardest to handle. Easter holidays were coming up, and she would have to share a room with Sirius again. She'd barely survived it over the Christmas holidays. She didn't know how she was going to over Easter or Merlin forbid, summer if Sirius was still here then.

"Perhaps," he finally answered. "I can't be sure though."

"I need to find someone to speak with about the Unseelie," Hermione muttered as she finished her tea. She'd gone about as far as she could go with research into the afterlife. Now it was time to see if a Fae expert would speak with her. She knew they were out there, but she hadn't contacted one yet.

"Did Harry clean out the library at Grimmauld?" Sirius asked. "We had an entire section on the Fae and how they were connected to the Most Ancient and Noble House of Black."

Hermione pursed her lips. "He did, but he put most of it in storage. I'll have to ask him."

"We can ask at dinner tomorrow, no?" Sirius asked. He'd been attending the bi-monthly dinners with the Potters, never wanting to forgo time spent with Harry, even if he wasn't corporeal for it.

Hermione nodded tightly, steeling herself. She would ask tomorrow, but it would mean coming up with an explanation for Harry. Hopefully, she could fob it off as work-related and not delve deeper into it than that. Hopefully.

* * *

"Hermione!" Harry greeted her as he threw open the door to Grimmauld Place. Hermione grinned and happily hugged her friend.

"Merlin, he looks like James," Sirius said behind her. He said it almost every time he saw Harry, and Hermione felt like she was getting better about not reacting when he spoke with others around.

"Hi, Harry." She grinned at him, stepping back. She handed him the bottle of wine she brought to share.

"Come on back, Ginny's just finishing up."

She and Harry chatted on the way to the kitchen. Harry had turned the dining room of Grimmauld Place into a home office and the family now took all of their meals at the table in the kitchen. It was Hermione's second favorite room in the house, the first being the library, small as it was.

Dinner was as lively as ever, and Hermione felt she was doing an excellent job keeping Sirius from stealing too much food from her plate. Ginny had made fish and chips, one of Hermione's favorites. So when Sirius stole the last chip, she slapped his hand.

"Oh, Sirius, really? It's the last one!" Hermione scolded.

Sirius stared at her in shock and after a moment, Hermione seemed to realize where she was. She'd just interacted with Sirius in front of Harry and Ginny.  _Shit, fuck, shit._  This was not good. Judging by the looks Harry and Ginny were giving her, it was definitely not good.

"What the hell, Hermione?" Harry asked her, looking as if she'd grown a second head. "Are you hearing voices?"

Hermione almost laughed at the absurdity of Harry asking her if she was hearing voices. It was Harry, after all, who was the parselmouth and the one most likely to be hearing voices others couldn't. She didn't say anything. What could she say? Should she lie or?

Sirius took the decision away from her by becoming corporeal in front of Harry and Ginny.

"What the fuck?!" Harry shouted and fell off the bench backward onto his rear end. Ginny sat shocked with her mouth hanging open.

"I'm back," Sirius said calmly and proceeded to eat the last chip from Hermione's plate.

Hermione buried her head into her hands. Another thing that was her fault. She'd been trying to keep Harry from finding out about Sirius. She had wanted this to be a blip on the radar where Harry never knew that Sirius had been back for a few months.

"What the fuck do you mean, you're back? Back from where? You're dead!" Harry shouted, getting to his feet.

"Harry," Ginny placated, placing her hand on his arm.

"No! He doesn't get to be dead for a quarter of a fucking century and just appear in my fucking kitchen! How did you make yourself invisible, anyway? I would have recognized the shimmer of a Disillusionment charm."

"Harry, calm down," Hermione began.

"Don't fucking tell me what to do, Hermione," Harry spat.

"Woah, mate, don't talk to her like that," Sirius began, also standing from the table.

"Sirius," Hermione hissed. "Let me handle him."

"Handle me? I've got to be handled? Fuck you, Hermione," Harry shouted, belligerent.

"Harry!" Ginny scolded.

"How long has he been back, Hermione? How long have you been hiding him from me?"

"Harry, it isn't like that. Let me explain. It was a mista—"

"A mistake?" Sirius sounded hurt, and Hermione rubbed her hands over her face in frustration.

"Would you just let me deal with this?" she snapped.

"Fine," Sirius muttered and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Harry, I fucked up at work. I made a mistake and now, Sirius is back. But he's not here to stay—"

"The hell I'm not," Sirius grumbled.

Hermione continued on as if she hadn't heard him, "I am working to send him back. It's why I didn't want to tell you. I didn't know how long he was going to be back for and I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up. But it's become clearer and clearer to me that wherever Sirius is from, is broken. I've got to fix it in order to send him back."

"How long has he been back, Hermione?" Harry asked. His voice harder and colder than Hermione had ever heard it directed her way.

"Six months," she whispered, not meeting his eyes.

"Six bloody months?! Are you fucking kidding me?" Harry shouted at her. He threw off Ginny's hand. "My godfather has been alive for six fucking months and you hid it from me? How could you do this to me? You know how I felt about him! How much I missed him when he was gone. How much I needed him."

Harry looked truly hurt and Hermione felt a prickle in the back of her eyes as she was faced with Harry's anguish. He wasn't wrong. Harry had been deprived of anything resembling family for most of his life, and here she had deprived him of his godfather for six whole months. Six months Harry could have spent with Sirius and Hermione had kept him to herself. Maybe she hadn't intended to be selfish, but at this moment, it sure felt like it.

"Harry, calm down," Sirius said.

Hermione couldn't say anything more. The anger and scorn in Harry's voice said enough. She'd finally done the one thing that would alienate Harry from her. She wiped at her cheeks and began willing her tears away. Crying wouldn't help. Ginny gave her a sad look but didn't say anything. Hermione nodded and turned away from everyone else in the room.

"She's been working her arse off, trying to fix her fucking mistake, Harry James Potter. You think about that," Sirius hissed before he followed her out of the kitchen.

She made it down the hall and out onto the stoop before the sob that had lodged itself in her throat worked its way out. Sirius caught her before she could fall and Apparated them both back to her cottage. He settled her on the couch and she cried all of her frustration and fears into his chest as he rocked her, smoothing his hand up and down her back. It felt strangely good to be wrapped in Sirius' arms, even under these circumstances. She couldn't quite figure out why Sirius would have bothered going after her. He'd gotten what he wanted after all. The whole time he'd been back, he had wanted to do more than see Harry, he wanted to talk to and hang out with Harry and Hermione hadn't allowed it.

When Sirius finally had his chance with Harry, he'd decided to follow her instead. She wasn't sure she could quite figure it out, and while she was insanely curious, she also couldn't bring herself to ask him. Instead, she burrowed further into the comfort he offered her. She didn't even notice when she fell asleep. Or that Sirius carried her to bed and tucked her in.

* * *

A week later, Hermione finally admitted defeat and traveled to Kenmare, County Kerry to speak with Seamus Finnigan's maternal grandmother, Maggie Harris. Seamus swore she was a Fae expert, and since they weren't exactly listed anywhere, Hermione decided to take his word for it. If nothing else, it got her out of England for the day. And if Maggie didn't know anything, perhaps she could point Hermione in the right direction.

She and Sirius Apparated to the public Apparition point in Kenmare and walked the few blocks to Maggie's home. She lived a few doors down from where Seamus grew up and he'd not only given Hermione the address but explicit written directions as well. He'd also done the courtesy of informing Maggie that Hermione would be stopping by.

"Please stay invisible," Hermione reminded Sirius.

"Hey, you outed me last time, love," Sirius teased her.

"Don't remind me," Hermione said. Harry still hadn't spoken to her or answered any of her owls. She was really concerned she'd truly cocked up their relationship. They hadn't had a fight this bad since they were teenagers.

"Oh, he'll come around," Sirius said, throwing his arm over Hermione's shoulders and giving her a half-hug. "He's just like James, angry and mad for a week, and then he'll come around once he sees reason. Ginny will talk some reason into him, you'll see."

"Maybe," Hermione muttered and bit her lip. She wasn't so sure this time.

They reached the front of Maggie's home, a small cottage, nestled amongst several other small cottages. The front garden was full of magical plants and Hermione smiled seeing it. She pushed herself through the very light Muggle-Repelling charms and opened the front gate. By the time she had reached the porch, the door was open and a tall, iron-haired witch stood in the doorway. She had a small smile on her face and was wiping her hands on a faded floral apron.

"You must be Hermione!" Maggie said. "Come in, come in! Seamus has told me so much about you from your school days. And of course, we get the  _Daily Prophet_  even all the way out here."

She ushered Hermione into the house with a pat on Hermione's back, chattering all the while. Hermione smiled and stepped inside the small, but warm and cozy cottage.

"Now, Seamus didn't tell me you were bringing someone along, who's this then?"

Hermione froze and turned to find Maggie pinning Sirius with a hard glare. Sirius stood just inside the doorway, and his eyes bounced between Hermione and Maggie.

"You can see him?" Hermione asked slowly.

"'Course I can, got eyes, don't I?"

"I think she's going to be very helpful," Sirius said confidently. "I'm Sirius Black." He stuck out his hand to shake Maggie's.

Maggie crossed her arms over her ample chest. "Sirius Black died many years ago. So my Seamus told me."

"It's true, I did die. But here I am." Sirius grinned. Hermione groaned.

"It's part of why we are here, Mrs. Harris."

"Maggie, call me Maggie. Mrs. Harris was my mother-in-law. Well, then you both sit down, I've got the tea on, we'll just have a cuppa and you can tell me all about it."

Hermione breathed a sigh of relief. She wasn't pleased that Sirius was being outed left and right now, but if Maggie took the idea of him being alive again with an offer of tea, she might be exactly who Hermione needed to find out about the Fae and the Unseelie King specifically.

She and Sirius sat at Maggie's worn kitchen table while Maggie bustled around, setting out a tea set and a plate of biscuits.

"Now, tell me how Sirius Black is among the living after being dead for so many years," Maggie said once she settled down across the table from Hermione and Sirius.

"It's your story, love," Sirius said and snagged another biscuit.

"I think I've found the Unseelie King's Grimoire," Hermione began. Maggie didn't interrupt, just raised her eyebrows. "It was with the last of the Selwyn estate. I work at the Ministry and go through donated and confiscated items. When I first looked at the book, it was completely blank. Then I pressed my hand on it, and this phrase suddenly appeared. I had checked and rechecked the book for any sort of ill-intent or compulsion charms and found nothing. But when this phrase appeared, I spoke it aloud, without meaning to."

"I was in this grey place, we've dubbed it the Grey, ever since I died, I think. I have no memory of anything else." Sirius took the story from there. "When one day, the Unseelie King came to me. Don't ask me how I knew it was him, I just did. I felt it in my bones or something. Blacks are descended from Fae, you know. And he offered me to go back to become the Magical Guardian of Hermione Granger-Weasley. So of course, I took the chance. How could I not? To be alive again?"

"But you aren't alive," Hermione said. She closed her eyes from the pain she knew she'd see in Sirius'. They both knew he wasn't really here.

"Right," Sirius said sadly.

Hermione went on with the story, discussing the translations of the book once she'd spoken the spell. Sirius talked about the Grey and how it seemed to be becoming more and more unstable.

"Well," Maggie sighed heavily. "I don't know anything about this Grey business, but the Unseelie King bit, that does sound familiar. What did he look like again?"

Sirius frowned. "He was man-like, but had a full set of antlers coming from his head. Towered over me, and I think if I didn't have any Fae running in my blood, he'd have scared the piss out of me. As it was, I was scared, but only a little. Like he wouldn't hurt me unless he had to. Or unless I refused him."

"Hmm, yes that does sound like the Unseelie King." Maggie nodded.

"But why would the Unseelie King offer help? I thought the Unseelie were about causing mischief?"

"I am mischief," Sirius flirted, grinning at her.

Hermione rolled her eyes and swatted his arm.

Maggie watched the byplay between them with worried eyes. "The Unseelie will help if it benefits them in some way. They aren't benevolent like you or I would think of the term, but they have been known to be if it suits them. I'm wondering if this Grey place Sirius was being held in is part of the Unseelie kingdom in some way. If it's unstable, that could be why the Unseelie King would offer help. Knowing that you, Hermione, would have the ability to figure out the problem."

Hermione blinked at Maggie, feeling goosebumps break out across her skin. "Why would the Unseelie King know anything about me?"

Maggie frowned. "Can I see your hand?"

Hermione offered her right hand for inspection. Maggie turned it over looking at both the back and the palm. Examining the palm, Maggie pressed her thumb into her hand, examining the lines she found there.

"I would bet you have some Fae blood. If you do, it's mighty easy for any of the Fae, particularly those of the courts to keep tabs on you," Maggie stated, releasing her hand.

"I don't want to get involved with anything Fae related, though," Hermione murmured, mostly to herself as she cradled her hand to her chest.

"Too late, love," Sirius said.

Maggie quirked a smile. "It doesn't much matter what you want, you've clearly been tapped by the Unseelie King. He wants your help and he's given you Sirius here to help you."

"Alright, so what am I supposed to do then?" Hermione asked. She felt like she was at a loss.

"I can't tell you that, lass."

Hermione snorted. She was hardly a lass at forty-two.

"What I would do is figure out a way to see this Grey place. That should at least clue you in."

"Thanks, Maggie." Hermione smiled at her. She didn't care for the news Maggie had given her today, but it was vital information that she didn't have before. She and Sirius stood to leave.

"Anytime, dear. And please come back if you think I can help in any way."

Hermione nodded and Sirius opened the door of the house, heading out on the porch.

"Hermione?" Maggie called her back. "I agree, Sirius can't stay on this plane," she said cryptically.

Hermione's heart felt tight. Someone agreed with her that Sirius was essentially an aberration. She hadn't let herself think about it much, but what if what was happening to The Grey happened to Earth because Sirius was here? She nodded once more to Maggie and followed Sirius back out to the walk out front.

"Well, creepy to find out we're related," Sirius commented.

"What?"

"Well, you've got Fae blood in you, I've got Fae blood in me, obviously we're related." Sirius grinned at her.

"Right," Hermione said, her lips twitching up into a small smile. She didn't know how Sirius knew when she needed cheering up, but he was remarkably good at it. Her heart fluttered and the small smile on her face turned into a frown. She couldn't let herself get too close to Sirius. Not knowing what she did now.


	6. Leashed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely BirdieMing for her beta work! Happy Holidays to everyone!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_You make me happy when skies are grey._

-You Are My Sunshine

* * *

_April 2022_

* * *

In the week after their visit to Maggie's, Hermione had come to an uncomfortable conclusion. She was going to have to speak with the Unseelie King. There was nothing else for it. The grimoire was proving useful, but it just wasn't enough and until Hermione figured out what the Grey was, she had to tackle this from another angle.

She shuddered when she thought of the Unseelie King. Hermione had never been interested in the Fae or the gods or any sort of Muggle religion. Her parents were firmly Christmas and Easter attendees of church and when Hermione had gone off to Hogwarts, she'd stopped attending altogether. She liked facts and science and magic. Not the unknowable entity that was religion and even if the Fae were real— _very much real,_  her mind whispered—that didn't mean she wanted anything to do with them. But she was running out of options and maybe out of time. Another reason to speak with the Unseelie King.

And the decision to speak with the Unseelie King created its own problems and issues. How did one find the Unseelie King? Could he be summoned like a ghost or a god? She didn't know. Although, if she had to put money on it, a summoning arranged similarly to summoning one of the old gods would probably work. The Fae were descendants of the Tuatha Dé Danann, the old gods according to Irish mythology.

Hermione's head ached. Mythology. They weren't mythology if they were real. Then what were they? Hermione didn't like anything that couldn't be classified somehow. And the Fae was just wishy-washy enough to drive her mad. So, she'd come to the conclusion that the Unseelie King had to be spoken to, which meant another trip to Maggie's and speaking with other Fae experts. The last thing Hermione wanted to do was offend the Unseelie King in some way and truly fuck up the world.

She sighed as she wrote out a list of everything she'd want to ask about summoning the Unseelie King when a knock sounded on her door. It was a drizzly, cold Saturday afternoon, and Hermione was surprised to find Harry standing on the other side. She quickly invited him in, shutting the rain and wind out with a firm snap.

"Harry," she said as soon as he was through the door. "Can I get you anything? Tea? Hot chocolate maybe? I just made some biscuits this morning," Hermione rambled as she shuffled to the kitchen to start the kettle. She was tense and yet relieved at the same time. Flustered. When was the last time she and Harry had fought? Truly fought? She didn't know.

Once she had Harry parked at the breakfast nook with a fresh cuppa and a plate of biscuits, she sat nervously across from him, winding her own hands around her warm mug. Neither of them said anything for a moment, and Hermione bit her lip, worried about what Harry was going to say. About why he'd come. She'd done the unforgivable and as forgiving and kind as Harry had always been, she was almost convinced that he was here to tell her to leave him alone, to tell her he wanted nothing to do with her.

She couldn't stand the silence anymore. "I'm so sorry. I didn't think about what I was depriving you of, only that I'd made a mistake and I needed to fix it. And I never should have tried to keep you and Sirius apart, and I'm so sor—"

Harry tsked and stood from his chair so quickly it knocked back onto the floor. He knelt before her and pulled her into a hug. She clutched at his back as he patted hers. "It's alright, 'Mione. I understand. Truly, I do. And I shouldn't have been so angry with you."

Hermione took a deep breath, inhaling Harry's scent. She willed her eyes to stay dry. She didn't really want to cry in front of him and pulled back from her best friend. "I hate fighting with you."

"We haven't done it in so long, I forgot we were capable," Harry teased.

"I can't believe you are just going to forgive him!" Sirius scolded from the sofa. Harry didn't react, so Hermione knew that he had remained invisible from his godson. She turned from Harry and narrowed her eyes at Sirius.

"He's your godson, and you've been whining about speaking with him for months. Of course, I have to forgive him," she said.

"Sirius?" Harry called out in the general direction of the living room. "Is he here? That's who you were talking to, right?"

"Merlin, did you have to reply?" Sirius asked as he glared at Harry.

"Grow up," Hermione snapped at Sirius. Then turned back around and took a sip of her tea. She was frustrated with the entire situation, and Sirius' childishness wasn't helping.

"Sirius Orion Black - show yourself immediately!" Harry demanded.

"Merlin, you sound like Lily," Sirius replied, and Hermione could see that this time Harry heard him. She warmed a little at hearing Sirius compare Harry to Lily. He so often compared his godson to James that it was rare to hear him talk about Lily.

Harry crossed his arms over his chest. "Nice of you to join the adults."

"And now you sound like me," Sirius replied, a confused look on his face. "She," he pointed at Hermione, "is your best friend. And has found herself wrapped up in something way bigger than her. You be nice to her." He wagged his finger at Harry.

"Did you not hear me forgive her?" Harry asked, holding up his arms. "I overreacted. I haven't done that in a while, but…"

Hermione bit her lip. She knew what he was going to say. But Sirius was  _his_  godfather. And she was his best friend and she should have told Harry. She regretted her actions immensely. She'd cost Harry six months of time with one of the only parental figures he'd ever had.

"Fuck," Sirius muttered. Harry nodded, and Hermione sighed. She stood from the table and drained her tea.

"You two should get caught up. I'm going on a walk," she said as she reheated the water in the teapot and set a spot for Sirius at the breakfast nook.

"In this weather?" Sirius asked.

Hermione turned and smirked at him, tapping the side of her nose. "I'm a witch," she said with a wink. She Summoned her raincoat from the front closet and left the cottage before Harry or Sirius said another word. She needed some time without testosterone.

Sirius wasn't wrong, the weather was downright nasty, and getting worse. It had been a windy drizzle when Harry had shown up, but it was turning into an outright storm now. She cast an Impervious charm on her raincoat and huddled into it as she walked along the path. There was a small duck pond about a mile from her cottage she liked to walk to occasionally, and that was where she headed now. The duck pond had the benefit of having a small picnic shelter where she could at least get out of the rain for a bit. It felt odd to be alone for the first time in months. Sirius had been her constant companion since he'd shown up back in October. Even when she was alone in her bedroom, she knew Sirius was just out in her living room. Her chest tightened when she thought of Sirius. She really didn't want to be falling in love with the man, but it seemed almost inevitable at this point.

Was this how love worked? It felt like a war of attrition. She'd been around Sirius so much. Were she and Ron like this too? Most likely. Wasn't that sad? Hermione felt like the only reason she could love someone was because she was around them so much. Merlin, that was a depressing thought. Hermione decided then, that whatever she felt toward Sirius, it couldn't possibly be real. They both agreed he wasn't really alive, and he had to go back. Well, she knew he had to go back, Sirius seemed to be in denial of it still.

For a moment, Hermione fantasized what it would be like if Sirius could stay. They could wake up on lazy weekend mornings and make each other breakfast. She'd laugh at his terrible jokes and he'd rub her feet as she read a book on the sofa. Cozy and domestic, but it was basically what they were doing now, and in her heart of hearts, Hermione knew it couldn't last. There was a reason Sirius had been sent back by the Unseelie King. Hermione shivered at the thought of the Fae knowing about her and about her life and worse still, meddling in her life. She didn't like the thought that her life wasn't her own to live, instead a pawn, a plaything for a being more powerful than her. Someone,  _something,_  she couldn't even begin to understand the motivations. It terrified her. And yet, there was a small part of her that was thrilled that some undefinable other being found her intelligent enough to help him with a problem. She had enough ego to recognize how powerful that thought could be and enough humility to know why that scared her.

She would do this one thing for the Unseelie King and never do anything for him again. She couldn't imagine getting herself mixed up in the Fae to that level. She didn't want to. She wanted to stay far, far away from it all.

"Aw, fuck!" Sirius shouted, interrupting her thoughts. Hermione turned to her left to find a sopping wet Sirius standing in his stocking feet in the mud next to her as she gazed out over the duck pond. She hadn't made it to the picnic shelter yet.

"How'd you get here?" Hermione asked, cocking her head to the side. She hadn't heard a crack of Apparition. And he wouldn't have known where she'd gone anyway, would he?

"Apparently, you have a range, darling. And this is it," Sirius held his arms out wide. His hair was dripping in his eyes, and he shivered in front of her. Hermione admired the way the rain soaked his clothes and lost herself in a small daydream of Sirius in the shower.

"Mind helping me out, love?" Sirius asked, wrapping his arms around himself and shivering violently, breaking Hermione from her reverie.

"Oh! Sorry." Hermione pulled out her wand and cast an Impervious charm on his clothes and his socks before applying a drying charm.

"That's a little better. Can we get out of the rain now?"

Hermione laughed. "Sure, let's go. Harry's probably freaking out anyway."

They walked the mile back to her cottage, Sirius complaining all the while that socks in mud, even with an Impervious charm, was not pleasant. Hermione let him chatter as she mulled over what it meant that she couldn't get farther than a mile from Sirius before he popped into existence in front of her. It only confirmed her theories that he had to go back to the Grey or some other afterlife.

"Merlin! There you are!" Harry said as they reached the front gate of Hermione's cottage. Harry was standing in the doorway, peering into the downpour.

Sirius and Hermione tramped in through the door, shedding their rain clothes as they went. Impervious charms were only good for so long, after all. Hermione Summoned a dressing robe for Sirius, one of hers that she'd Transfigured larger for him months ago.

"What happened?" Harry asked as Hermione hung up her raincoat and Sirius picked up his wand from the kitchen table. With a flick, he changed from his sopping wet clothes into the waiting dressing robe.

"He has a leash," Hermione said dryly.

"I'm not a dog!" Sirius insisted.

Harry chortled. Then sobered. "Does this mean you aren't really alive?"

Hermione's lips tightened. She didn't know how to answer that question.

"'Course I am!" Sirius cried, then reached over and pinched Harry's arm.

"Ouch!"

"See, couldn't do that if I were a ghost, could I?"

"I guess not," Harry replied, but Hermione could still hear the skepticism in his voice.

"Really, I'm fine," Sirius said. "Tell him Hermione!"

"Sirius," Hermione warned. He knew her thoughts on it. How could he not? They'd been constant companions for six months.

"Hermione, tell me the truth," Harry said.

Sirius' jaw tightened and he turned away from both of them to sit on the sofa in the living room. Hermione met Harry's eyes and shook her head.

"I'm still researching it," is what she said though. "I've been looking into it for months, but I think we found a bit of a break last week. So I'm hoping to have more news soon."

"That's good," Harry said brightly. "Right, Sirius?"

"Yeah," Sirius muttered.

"Er, right, well I should probably get back," Harry began.

"Right, okay. We still having dinner next week?" Hermione asked brightly.

"Of course, and Sirius, you should be visible for it too," Harry said.

"Right," Sirius replied dully.

"Is he going to be alright?" Harry whispered to Hermione when they stood at her door.

Hermione nodded. "Don't worry about it. He gets like this."

Harry smiled tightly and gave Hermione a brief hug before leaving the cottage and Apparating away.

"You do realize this is basically one room and I can hear everything."

"It's that canine hearing," Hermione replied, trying to lighten the mood.

"I'm not a fucking dog," Sirius growled.

"Really? You're growling like one." She stood in front of the couch and crossed her arms over her chest. He didn't meet her gaze.

"For fuck's sake, Hermione. Don't treat me like a goddamned child!" Sirius shouted, standing suddenly from the couch. His fists clenched at his sides.

"Then don't bloody act like one, Sirius! Godric's saggy tits, what do you want from me?" Hermione ran a hand through her hair in frustration as they stood toe-to-toe, both breathing heavily.

"Godric's saggy tits?" Sirius laughed, throwing his head back. "That's a new one." The tension was broken, and Hermione felt like she could breathe again. She took a deep shuddering breath as Sirius' laughter faltered.

"I don't want to leave," Sirius said quietly. He settled his hands on her shoulders. Hermione wanted to both shrug them off and step into his embrace at the same time. Instead, she stood still.

"I know," Hermione replied.

"Do you really want me to leave?" Sirius asked. The uncertainty in his voice was astounding and Hermione felt bowled over by it. Sirius was always so certain of himself and his position in the world. Did he not think she liked him? Or wanted him?

Hermione couldn't meet his gaze anymore and looked down at her feet. Sirius let his hands slip from her shoulders, and he turned from her.

"No, I don't want you to go," she whispered, finally admitting at least some of her desires out loud.

Sirius turned back around to face her. "Truly?"

Hermione nodded, biting her lower lip, but unwilling to meet his eyes. Merlin, how could he have such an effect on her? The hope in his voice was enough to make her knickers wet. She wasn't a teenager, she could control her response to this man. She would control her responses from now on. Why had she admitted that to him? Now he would be pressing harder and harder to stay, and Hermione didn't know if she had the ability to hold him off.

Suddenly, Sirius swept her into his embrace and hugged her to him tightly. She wrapped her own arms around him, allowing herself to feel the comfort that he offered. For the first time all day, she felt her body relax and the tension she was holding release. He felt so good pressed against her, and she desperately wanted to feel this every day of the rest of her life. She  _knew_  that the Unseelie King had only sent Sirius back in order to gain Hermione's help. With what, she still wasn't sure, but she did know that if she didn't figure it out soon, the Unseelie King would come calling.


	7. Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely BirdieMing for her beta work! Happy Holidays to everyone! This one is coming a day early, as I'll be traveling tomorrow. Enjoy!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_Time just slips away,_

_the sky a dismal_

_ashen grey._

_-Christy Ann Martine_

* * *

_April 2022_

* * *

"Don't show yourself until we're inside," Hermione reminded Sirius as they prepared to Apparate to Grimmauld Place.

"I know, kitten." Sirius grinned when she scowled at him.

"And no pet names tonight," Hermione warned.

"Ah, you take the fun out of everything."

Hermione rolled her eyes and grasped his arm, turning to her left to Apparate them from the front walk of her cottage to the front walk of Grimmauld Place.

"Merlin, warn a wizard before you do that, love," Sirius grumbled as he caught himself from falling.

Hermione rolled her eyes again and knocked on the door.

"Hermione!" Ginny pulled the door open, pulling her inside. Hermione laughed at Ginny's exuberance as if having not seen each other for a month was so terribly uncommon.

"And Sirius." Ginny's smile faltered for a moment before brightening. "Harry's going to be so pleased to see you."

"He better be," Sirius groused, "after that horrendous Apparition I've just been made to endure."

Ginny raised her eyebrow at Hermione as Sirius brushed past them both and headed for the kitchen at the back of the house.

"Never mind." Hermione shook her head before she and Ginny followed after him.

Hermione smiled when she saw Harry and Sirius in deep conversation at one end of the table. It almost felt like they were teenagers again, before the worst of the war had happened. Her heart lurched for everything that had been lost during the war. Even these many years later, war was war. She shook her head, erasing her morbid thoughts and followed Ginny to the business side of the kitchen.

"Can I do anything to help?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, yeah, here open this." Ginny set a bottle of red wine and a wine opener in front of her before she turned back to the oven.

"Sure," Hermione said and began opening the wine.

Soon, dinner was ready and Hermione found herself seated next to Sirius once more. This time he had his own plate, but it didn't stop him from sneaking bites off of Hermione's. She'd just slapped his hand away for the third time.

"This makes so much more sense." Harry shook his head, laughing.

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.

"Well, Ginny and I couldn't figure out how you were eating so much at dinner and not gaining weight. I thought for sure you were just skipping meals again and was making up for it with dinners here."

Hermione snorted. "Had to keep the brute fed, didn't I?"

"Hey!" Sirius said, clearly offended. "I'm not a brute."

"No, but you sneak bites of food off my plate like you are a dog," Hermione teased.

"Not a dog either…cougar." Sirius' smirk was playful.

"I— I'm not. Circe, Sirius Black, you are a right pest," Hermione told him and turned back to her dinner. She missed the look Harry and Ginny exchanged.

Dinner finished quickly after that, and Harry drew Sirius back into conversation about Muggle motorbikes.

Hermione helped Ginny to clear the table and with the dishes. A few spells and they were set to washing themselves. Ginny dragged Hermione to the sitting room with a new bottle of wine.

"Okay, spill," Ginny said once she sat Hermione down on the sofa next to her.

"About what?" Hermione asked. She was genuinely confused about what Ginny was expecting her to say.

"About how long you've been sleeping with Sirius," Ginny replied, taking a sip of her wine.

"What?! I'm not!" Hermione replied. Ginny thought they were sleeping together? That was ridiculous.

Ginny pursed her lips and raised her eyebrow. "If you aren't yet, you will be soon."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Hermione replied.

"Seriously? Hermione, the tension, the flirting, it's palpable. Even Harry can see it!"

"Well, I'm not," Hermione insisted. "And I won't be. Gin, he can't stay. He's not really back. He has to go back to where he came from. I just have to figure out how to send him back there. Why would I do that to myself? Why would I allow myself to fall for him when I know that I can't keep him?"

Ginny's face almost fell, and Hermione covered her mouth with her hands. She'd just admitted it aloud. Oh, Merlin, she was falling for Sirius Black. Sirius Black who had a deadline, who wasn't going to be able to stay. Fuck, she was a prize idiot.

"Fuck, fuck, bloody, fuck," Hermione moaned under her breath, dropping her head into her hands.

"Oh, 'Mione." Ginny moved to sit next to her on the sofa and rubbed her back. "It'll be alright. It'll work out in the end."

"I'm scared, Gin," Hermione said. "I'm scared of my feelings for him, and I'm scared that I won't be able to do the right thing when the time comes. I'm scared I won't work hard enough to figure out what the right thing is, and I'll entirely fuck up the world."

"What do you mean?" Ginny asked.

"The Unseelie King sent Sirius back. This is more than just a cosmic blip, a flaw in the matrix, this is something far beyond humans. It's Fae and gods and, fuck, I don't even understand it all myself."

"Oh, 'Mione," Ginny said again and pulled her in for a hug. Hermione hugged her friend back as she willed back her tears. She had no time for crying, even if that's all she felt like doing these days.

After a while, Ginny spoke again, and Hermione pulled away from her friend, "Maybe you should take comfort from him while you can?"

Hermione shook her head. "I can't," she whispered.

"Can't what, love?" Harry asked as he and Sirius joined them in the sitting room.

Hermione hastened to dab her eyes dry with the collar of her shirt while Ginny answered her husband and refilled everyone's wine glasses. Hermione was thankful for the distraction.

* * *

"So," Sirius said once they were back at Hermione's cottage that night. They were seated in her breakfast nook, finishing a bottle of wine they'd opened the night before.

Hermione hummed to indicate she was listening.

"I, maybe, sort of, overheard you and Ginny at Grimmauld Place…"

Hermione stiffened and turned away from him. Sweet Merlin, what exactly had he overheard?

"How much?" she asked.

"Enough," Sirius said, but he sounded like he was guessing.

"Right, well, I'm off to bed," Hermione announced and downed the rest of her wine.

"Oh, come on, kitten. Don't be like that," Sirius said as she stood. He followed her down the short hallway to her bedroom.

She ignored him.

"Hermione!" he shouted once she closed the door behind herself. "We have to talk about this some time!"

Hermione cast a silencing charm at the door and then leaned against it, relishing the peace it brought her. Sirius wasn't wrong, they would have to talk about it. Eventually. Hermione just wasn't going to do it after having drunk almost a whole bottle of wine. And right now, she wasn't ready to talk to him about it. She felt too raw. Her emotions were too close to the surface, and she didn't think she could trust herself around Sirius. Not without sounding like a complete idiot and confessing her love for him.

Oh, sweet Nimue. She didn't just have feelings for Sirius Black. She loved him. Hermione slid down the door until she was sitting as a sob she didn't realize was there poured out of her. How in the world had she found herself in the position of loving a man who wasn't really alive?

* * *

Hermione took a deep breath as the Hogwarts Express pulled into the station at Kings Cross. It was Easter holidays and while she was excited to see her kids, another week with Sirius in her bedroom was enough to drive her spare. She had barely held back at Christmas, and now that she was actually recognizing her feelings for what they were, she knew she was going to be in trouble. Maybe she should stock up on Dreamless Sleep for the week.

"Mum!" Rose shouted as she exited the train. Sirius was her ever-present silent guardian since they'd found out about the leash. They had done some experimenting and distance and time were both a factor. Hermione could Floo or Apparate somewhere, but if she was gone longer than a half hour or so, Sirius would pop into existence right beside her. It was bloody annoying.

Rose enveloped Hermione in a big hug, and Hermione was surprised to see that Rose was finally taller than her. Hermione wasn't particularly short, but Ron was very tall and Rose had inherited that from her father.

"Hi Rosie, how are you?" Hermione asked, giving her daughter a tight squeeze.

"Mum!" Hugo rushed up and came at her from the side, almost bowling her over as he wrapped his arms around both her and Rose. Hermione took a deep breath. It felt good having her children with her. She missed them entirely too much when they were away at Hogwarts. She smiled brightly as she pulled away and led them to the Floo.

Landing in her own hearth, Hermione whipped out her wand to spell the soot off of everyone and their trunks. She had successfully stalled any conversations with Sirius since dinner with the Potters. She only spoke with him in regards to the grimoire translations and theories about the Fae. She hadn't yet told him that she was sure they were going to need to speak with the Unseelie King. She wasn't sure how she was going to broach that topic with him, and she wanted to think about it first. Sirius was enough of a Gryffindor that he would try summoning the Unseelie King then spout off and get them both killed. Hermione was desperately trying to solve the issue of Sirius being back and fixing the Grey because that obviously was what the Unseelie King wanted. And maybe Sirius wasn't alive, but she bet when she shared a bed with him later that night he was going to feel awfully solid.

She shook her head to clear her thoughts and smiled as Rose and Hugo ran down the short hall to the only spare room she had and began fighting over the bunk beds once more. Sirius had disappeared as soon as they had arrived back home and for that, Hermione was grateful. For all that he liked to joke and press Hermione's buttons, he was tactful enough to leave her alone when her kids were around.

Dinner that night was a rowdy affair, and Hermione felt at peace having her children home and under her roof once more. The days where her children wouldn't be living with her for even part of the year were coming quickly, and Hermione didn't know what she'd do with herself when that time came.

"Are you coming to Grandma Molly's party on Sunday?" Rose asked after they finished up dessert and were clearing the table.

"Oh, I don't thi—"

"Please mum!" Hugo begged, "You skipped out on Boxing Day."

"Well, I guess I could come for just a bit," Hermione hedged. She really did try to avoid gatherings at the Burrow. Arthur was still lovely to her, but Molly had become somewhat colder since the divorce. And Romilda was…Romilda.

"Oh! I'm so excited!" Hugo exclaimed, jumping up and down, making Hermione laugh. How could she refuse him when he was so happy with such a simple thing from her?

"Well, since you are clearly too excited to go to bed right now," Hermione began, "I guess you get to pick the game tonight!"

"Oh, excellent!" Hugo ran over to the front closet where Hermione stored the board games as she and Rose finished cleaning up in the kitchen.

"Really?" Rose complained. "He's going to pick Monopoly again. It's sooo boring."

"We'll play house rules so that it goes fast," Hermione told her daughter. She also didn't care for Monopoly, but her father had bought it for Hugo a few years ago, and he'd been hooked ever since.

* * *

Easter Sunday came quickly, as dreaded events always did.

"Do I get to come along?" Sirius asked as he lounged on her bed, watching Hermione do her makeup.

"I don't think the leash will allow you to stay behind," Hermione commented.

"I'm not a dog," Sirius complained.

Shrugging, Hermione said, "I'm not the one fitted with a leash."

"Technically…"

"I can go wherever I want, and you have to follow. Hence you are the one on the leash, Sirius," Hermione reasoned.

Sirius pouted. "I hate it when you're right."

"I'm usually right," Hermione said.

"Except…"

"Drop it," Hermione snapped. She knew he was going to bring up him and the Unseelie King and the grimoire, but Hermione had other things to think about today. Like how to successfully avoid both Molly and Romilda for the majority of the afternoon. And Ron. Hermione almost groaned at that thought. Ron would for sure want to speak with her, which meant that Romilda would then try to find Hermione later on her own. She wished Romilda would just get over it already.

"Easy there, cougar." Sirius winked at her from the bed. Hermione rolled her eyes at him.

"Ready?"

"Always." Sirius smirked.

Hermione stood and left her bedroom, Sirius following behind her. She guided both Rose and Hugo through the fireplace before turning back to Sirius.

"Stay invisible. Teddy will be there."

"Teddy?"

Hermione's face fell. Sirius would have never met Teddy. He'd died before Remus and Tonks had even gotten together, let alone married and had a child.

"He's Remus and Tonks' son," Hermione said quietly. She reached out and placed a hand on Sirius' arm.

"They had a son? Wow," Sirius said. His voice was awed, a faraway look in his eyes, and Hermione's heart broke for the man. He'd missed so much, and still was only going to miss more. Especially living this half-life he was living now. Her resolve hardened only that much more, he had to go back. This wasn't fair to him.

"Will you be alright?" Hermione asked.

"Of course." Sirius nodded, and Hermione gazed at him a beat more, just to make sure. He nodded once more and quirked a smile at her.

"Alright, let's go." She turned back to the fireplace.

* * *

Molly's Easter party was about as awful as Hermione had predicted. She'd been able to avoid both Molly and Romilda until it came time to sit down for the meal. Molly had the large tent set up in the backyard, per all Burrow parties these days. The Weasleys were just too large of a clan to fit into the Burrow comfortably anymore.

Ron had cornered her as soon as she sat. She'd chosen an end seat so Sirius could at least steal food off her plate easily, even if it meant he had to stand or sit on the grass. Ron had chosen to sit directly to her right, and so Romilda sat across from her. Hermione smiled at her ex and his wife as she began serving herself.

"Hermione, how are you?" Romilda asked. Hermione knew that while this question sounded perfectly innocuous, it was really only a lead in for Romilda to begin asking about her love life. As if it was any of Romilda's business what Hermione's love life was like.

"Just fine." Hermione smiled tightly at the other woman. Romilda was still very beautiful, her hair a darker shade than Hermione's, but just as curly. Which made Hermione think that Ron had a 'type.' Lavender had also had very curly hair, like Hermione's, except hers was blonde. Suddenly, Hermione wasn't very hungry.

"Please, you are so much better than her, cougar," Sirius commented from behind her. He placed his hand on her shoulder, and although Hermione knew nobody else could see it, it did ease some of her tension.

"Who are you dating these days?" Romilda asked. "I love hearing all the gossip."

Hermione struggled to keep the smile on her face.

"Oh, well you know me. I've never been much for dating."

"Well, obviously you're dating me," Sirius commented wolfishly.

Hermione wanted to throw an elbow back at him, but she knew it would look odd. Ever since having been caught out by Harry and Ginny, she'd been very conscious of her interactions with Sirius around others.

"Ohhhh." Romilda nodded and tapped her nose. Hermione struggled not to roll her eyes and turned to Ron to find his face buried in his plate, listening to Charlie prattle on about Quidditch League scores. She was going to find no help there and turned back to Romilda to see that the other woman was wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

"So who are you sleeping with then?" Romilda grinned slyly.

"Me," Sirius practically growled from behind her. Hermione's heart fluttered at the tone and the way his hand tightly gripped her shoulder. She wished she were sleeping with Sirius, and the moment the thought flew into her head she wished she'd never thought it. Because now she was imagining it. Closing her eyes, Hermione took a deep breath.

"Oooo, I bet it's someone good!" Romilda practically shouted. Hermione popped her eyes open, startled.

"Oh, no! I mean, I'm not sleeping with or dating anyone," Hermione explained.

"Except me," Sirius whispered.

"Oh." Romilda looked disappointed. Then she looked suspiciously between Hermione and Ron, who still hadn't spoken to each other since they sat down.

Hermione fought not to roll her eyes, Romilda was ridiculously obvious and equally ridiculously insecure.

"I'm really busy with work," Hermione continued. "I found a fascinating book. I'm not quite sure what it is," she lied, "and it's taking ages to translate it all from Irish. But it's so interesting. All about ancient rituals and…"

She trailed off as Romilda turned to Angelina, seated next to her, and began asking about the kids.

"You've done that before," Sirius accused.

Hermione nodded slightly in response and turned back to her dinner.

After dinner was over, Molly cornered her. The kids were due to spend the night at the Burrow, and Hermione was sure Molly would be filling their ears with things Hermione would rather they not hear. Molly had never forgiven her for divorcing Ron, and likely never would, despite the pleasant face she put on in company.

"Still working too many hours?" Molly asked. Her tone was sweet, but Hermione could hear the steel beneath it. She felt Sirius stiffen beside her, and she desperately wished he would go somewhere else. She didn't relish being tongue-lashed by Molly in Sirius' presence.

"Mmm," Hermione hummed. "I'm working on a fascinating book right now actually." As she rattled off the details of the books, she hoped to bore Molly away like she had with Romilda earlier, but Molly was smarter than Romilda, and not as easily distracted.

"I still don't understand why you bother with all of those dusty books," Molly commented. Hermione stiffened, and Sirius began rubbing her lower back. She desperately wanted to melt into the slight embrace he was offering. She sat ramrod straight as Molly began commenting on everything from Hermione's hair, to her clothes and work habits, to the strange fact that even though she had divorced the perfection that was Ron Weasley, she still hadn't found someone else to marry her.

"Aunty 'Mione!" Teddy Lupin shouted from the back doorway of the Burrow, interrupting whatever it was that Molly had been saying to her. Teddy was late, as usual, although with the way Molly harangued him too, she wasn't surprised that he opted out of the meal.

"Is that…?" Sirius trailed off and Hermione made her excuses to Molly as she approached Teddy.

"Teddy, it's so good to see you!" Hermione embraced the man whom she'd thought of as a nephew for as long as he'd been alive. Teddy picked her up and twirled her around and Hermione heard Sirius shout.

"Oi! She's not a toy, you wanker!"

It only made Hermione giggle harder. Teddy finally set her down and began discussing the latest Transfiguration theories. He'd changed his hair to match hers like he always did when he was speaking with someone he liked.

"Woah, did his hair just change?" Sirius asked. He reached out a hand to touch Teddy, and Hermione shuffled around Teddy so that she was between him and Sirius.

"Let's catch up in a bit," Hermione said, "need the loo."

Teddy grinned and nodded. Hermione dragged Sirius off to the loo as discreetly as possible.

"I want to reveal myself to him," Sirius demanded. "I want to know my best friend's kid."

"Sirius, you know that's not a good idea. You have to go back. If we don't figure this out soon, the Unseelie King is going to come knocking, I can feel it in my bones. It's too dangerous for more people to know. I'm sorry but—"

"You aren't the boss of me, kitten," Sirius growled. He was angrier than Hermione had ever seen him.

"I know. I'm not. And I'm an awful human being. I feel badly enough about this entire situation, I don't need you guilting me! But you can't let Teddy see you. You just can't! He's only twenty-four, Sirius. Both his parents are dead, just like Harry's. Don't burden him with this."

"With what?" Sirius' voice was low and deadly.

"With you! You aren't staying. You are going to get chummy with Teddy, and then promptly leave. Leaving him alone again. Don't do that to him."

"Like I did to Harry, you mean," Sirius sneered at her.

"Fuck, Sirius. That's not what I meant!" Hermione exclaimed, throwing up her hands. Sirius glared at her and then left the bathroom. Hermione sat hard on the toilet, burying her face in her hands. It didn't seem like she could get anything right with Sirius.


	8. Repercussions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely BirdieMing for her beta work!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_I like the muted sounds, the shrouds of grey, and the silence that comes with fog._

_-Om Malik_

* * *

_May 2022_

* * *

Hermione rubbed her eyes as she stumbled into the living room. Harry was there already and in deep discussion with Sirius about the upcoming Quidditch season. She waved at them before she went to make coffee for the three of them. She and Sirius had been up late again the night before, discussing the Grey and the newest translations Sirius had made in the grimoire. They had finally decided it was indeed the Unseelie King's grimoire and that clearly he pulled a few cosmic strings in order for it to fall into Hermione's hands. She was still reluctant to summon him, hoping she could figure out exactly what was going on before getting to that point.

After her shower, she joined Sirius and Harry in the living room where Sirius was telling Harry about his dream-walking.

"Did you see my parents?" Harry asked. Hermione couldn't decipher the look on his face, confusion, and maybe something more.

"Do you think if I dream-walked with you, I could see them too?" Harry asked. Hermione thought he looked excited. Hermione was about to counsel him otherwise when Sirius beat her to it.

"I do, but dream-walking isn't safe. Especially in the Grey," Sirius said. "There's something  _wrong_  with it."

"The Grey?"

Hermione sighed and sat down next to Harry. "The Grey is where Sirius and your parents are at. It's not quite the afterlife. It's not Beyond the Veil, nor is it the Void, but something else entirely. We don't know what it is, or how it came to be, but it seems like it somehow falls under the purview of the Unseelie King."

"The Unseelie King?" Harry asked dubiously.

"I know. It sounds insane, doesn't it?" Hermione laughed softly. "But it's true. The Unseelie King is who sent Sirius back to the land of the living. He made Sirius my magical guardian, and it's the Unseelie King's grimoire that landed in my lap at work. We just don't know what the Grey is, how it came to be, or what to do about the fact that it seems to be failing somehow."

"Why not ask the Unseelie King?" Harry asked.

"That's what I've been saying!" Sirius exclaimed.

"Because! The Unseelie King is a  _god_ , you realize that? He's an all-powerful being that nobody on this earth could possibly understand. I get the arrogance that runs through the Potter and Black veins, but I'm not so arrogant to think that I can call a  _god_  to come and do my bidding."

"Okay, setting aside the Unseelie King issue for now, who else is in the Grey? How many people? And can you interact with them?" Harry asked.

"Loads," Sirius replied. "I know quite a few of them, but then it's strange, there are people I would expect to see and don't. Like how Remus is there, but Peter's not. Nor is Dora."

Hermione watched as Harry's face scrunched in confusion before a dawning horror came over him.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Nothing," Harry said quickly.

"Harry! If you know something or suspect something, you have to tell me!" Hermione said.

"I don't know anything," Harry insisted. "But I thought of something. I need to do some checking first. I don't want to alarm you needlessly."

Hermione glared at him. She didn't like it when Harry got this secretive look about him. It reminded her of their school days when he tried to keep information from her and Ron in order to not involve them.

"Just so we're perfectly clear," Hermione said. "This situation, with Sirius not quite back from the dead, is almost entirely my fault. I'm already involved, so whatever idiotic thing you are thinking about, you just keep that in mind. You won't fix this without me."

"Alright, I won't. Let me do some checking and I'll get back to you, Hermione. I promise." Harry sounded sincere, but Hermione was reluctant to believe him. He turned to Sirius. "You never answered my question. Can you interact with the people you see in the Grey?"

"Yes." Sirius nodded. He looked between Hermione and Harry. "Honestly, it's been a bit of a relief to be able to talk to someone there, anyone. Prior to the Unseelie King pulling me out of there, I thought I was there alone. Somehow, he seems to have broken down some sort of barrier. James and Remus have said the same thing, that they were there alone before now."

"Can you do me a favor?" Harry asked. When Sirius nodded, he went on, "Find someone you don't know personally. Ask them after they died if they came back, even briefly, because a loved one called them back."

"How would a loved one call them back?" Sirius asked. Hermione listened with dawning horror. There was only one way to call a loved one back. Was the Resurrection Stone responsible for the creation of the Grey?

"Don't worry about that, just ask the question. I'll be back in a few days." Harry stood and strode to the door.

"Harry," Hermione called out. She didn't know what she was going to say, but she was desperate to know if he thought the same thing she did.

"I'll be back," Harry said, shutting the door softly behind him.

Hermione felt a sense of horror wash over her at the idea that the Resurrection Stone was responsible for the Grey. How long ago had the Peverells created it? How many people were stuck in the Grey for a thousand years or more? It was bad enough that Sirius and Harry's parents were there for the last forty years or so. It was much worse to think about someone's soul being trapped there for more than a millennium.

* * *

Ever since the conversation with Harry and Sirius a week ago, Hermione couldn't get thoughts of the Resurrection Stone out of her mind. She felt more and more sure that her hunch was right. The Resurrection Stone was responsible for the Grey. She felt sick when she thought about it and decided that there was no way that Sirius was going back there without her. She needed to see for herself what was going on.

It took her two days of research, but she found what she was looking for. She knew there was a potion for almost everything. There had to be one for dream-walking too. She stared at the ingredients list for a few minutes, and it wasn't a hard recipe, not even in the least. She'd left Sirius in her office, working on grimoire translations, while she spent her time in the Ministry archives. It strained Sirius' leash, but if she stayed in the northwest corner, then Sirius could stay safe in her office.

That evening, she and Sirius stopped at an apothecary. Hermione told him she was low on some common supplies, and she hurried around the small shop gathering everything she needed for the Dream-Walking Inducement potion as well as a few other odds and ends. She didn't think Sirius would know about the potion, but she felt like she needed to cover her tracks. Instinctively, she knew that Sirius would be horrified if he knew she planned to dream-walk with him.

Hermione picked a fight with Sirius when they reached her cottage. She didn't want to stay up with him for hours, dissecting everything they'd gone over already. She wanted to get working on the Dream-Walking Inducement, which needed to be done without Sirius hovering over her.

"Merlin's sake, can't I get any fucking space," she muttered under her breath after tripping over Sirius' boots.

"Buy a bigger house." Sirius smirked at her, and Hermione found she didn't actually have to fake her anger.

"What for? You're leaving. My children are growing up. Soon it'll just be me," Hermione snapped.

"I'm not leaving," Sirius ground out. "If anything  _you_  are pushing me away. You have been pushing me away for  _months_."

"Because you don't belong here!" Hermione shouted. "You don't belong here with me. You belong Beyond the Veil. You are dead, and there's no bringing you back. That's not how the world works, Sirius! I wish you'd grow the fuck up."

A hurt look crossed Sirius' face, and Hermione felt awful as he stormed out of the cottage. The door slamming sounded like a cannon in her ears, and she held back the tears that threatened to fall. She didn't have time for this. She had a potion to make.

The Dream-Walking Inducement took a couple of hours to make, and by the time Sirius had cooled off enough to come back inside the cottage, it was ready. Hermione cleaned up and retreated to her bedroom before Sirius came back. She heard the door slam again and him shuffling out in the living room for a few minutes before everything went quiet. She let out the breath she didn't know she was holding when the light that crept in under her door went out. She gave it another thirty minutes and then downed the potion.

Hermione settled herself in bed and closed her eyes. She took a few deep breaths and began meditating lightly. Meditation almost always put her to sleep and moments later her breathing evened out entirely and she was asleep.

_When she opened her eyes she was greeted with a hellscape. Everything was grey. She held her hand up in front of her face to see that even her skin was grey. Looking down, so were her clothes. All she could see was grey everywhere. It was like being in a giant grey box, but the floor wasn't flat, it undulated like a meadow. A low mist rolled across the ground and swirled when Hermione moved forward._

" _Hello?" she called out. There was no one._

" _What the fuck do you think you're doing?" someone spat from behind her. Hermione whirled around to find Sirius standing there. His hands were on his hips, and he glared at her._

" _I needed to see for myself, Sirius," Hermione tried to explain. Sirius strode forward and gripped her wrist tightly, pulling her against him._

" _What you need is to mind your own fucking business," he hissed into her face._

" _This is my business!" Hermione insisted. "The Unseeli—"_

" _Don't say his fucking name!" Sirius shouted, covering her mouth with his hand. "You'll conjure him!"_

_Hermione tore Sirius' hand from her mouth. "Fine. But I still needed to see for myself." She softened her voice and said, "Is this where you spent twenty-five years? By yourself?"_

_Sirius dropped his hold on her wrist, and Hermione could see his Adam's apple bob. "Yes," he whispered._

" _Oh, Sirius," Hermione sighed and placed her hand inside one of his, squeezing his fingers. Sirius squeezed back, and they turned to gaze at the landscape before them. Slowly, bit-by-bit, Hermione could see shapes moving in the grey of the fog, though nothing was distinguishable._

" _Is that… are they?" Hermione couldn't finish the question. Suddenly, James Potter broke through the fog._

" _Padfoot!" James shouted and was before them sooner than Hermione could have been prepared for. "Who's this?" James pointed at Hermione._

_Hermione swallowed hard. He looked so much like Harry had when they were younger. Harry was… her heart lurched, Harry was older than his father now. Her stomach rolled, and Hermione thought she'd get sick when she felt Sirius' arm around her waist, anchoring her to him. She was more grateful than she realized for the support._

" _She's leaving," Sirius growled. Hermione stamped her foot in response and was startled when the fog at their feet was kicked up and swirled around them._

" _James? Where are you?" A woman's voice came from behind James._

" _Sirius is here Lils," James called over his shoulder._

" _I shouldn't be here," Hermione muttered to Sirius._

" _No shit," Sirius hissed._

" _No, I mean, I should be investigating this place. Not chit-chatting. I'll be back," Hermione whispered and slipped from underneath Sirius' arm._

_It didn't take her very many steps to find herself lost in the sea of mist once more._

_She took a deep breath to steady her nerves. Seeing James Potter had shaken her more than she had ever assumed it would. The last thing she wanted to see was Harry's eyes staring out at her from Lily's face. Her heart clenched, and she pushed thoughts of Sirius and the Potters out of her mind. She needed to know what the Grey was and how it came to be. It was clearly not natural, not if the Unseelie King wanted to be rid of it. Was Harry's theory about the Resurrection Stone right? How could she find out?_

_She wandered around for a bit, not running into anyone when she started to hear voices. One seemed so familiar, it made her feel safe and she found her feet carrying her closer and closer._

" _And what happens when you do that?" the familiar voice said._

" _Nothing," another voice spat. "That's the problem. How are we going to get out of here?"_

" _We're brilliant wizards, Gellie, we'll figure something out."_

" _It's been months, Albie! We haven't found anything so far. And who knows how long it was before we 'woke up.' The world has likely changed and moved on by now. And I for one am anxious to get back to it."_

" _Even after all these years? You're dead. It's time you start—"_

_The other voice snorted, interrupting the voice Hermione recognized. "Like you wouldn't do anything to get back topside."_

" _What I want is to see my sister," the familiar voice hissed in a tone so unfamiliar and angry, that Hermione found herself drawing back from the two men. She still couldn't see them, but there was something so familiar about the one called Albie. Albie._

_**Oh, holy fucking Merlin,** _ _Hermione thought as she slapped her forehead. Albie was obviously Albus fucking Dumbledore. Which could only mean that Gellie was Gellert bleeding Grindelwald. How in the world…? She shook her head as she heard them talking more._

" _The only option is to bring the whole thing down," Grindelwald said. "It's the only way."_

" _And if we vanish everyone here, including ourselves, to the Void instead of Beyond the Veil?" Dumbledore asked. A very valid question, Hermione thought._

" _Don't you see? That's the point! If we get this place in enough flux we can bring the Void and Beyond the Veil together that we should be able to propel ourselves to Beyond the Veil, instead of the Void."_

" _And what about everyone else here?" Dumbledore asked calmly. Hermione could just see him in her mind's eye, casting a hand out, indicating the space around them. Her heart clenched, her thoughts on Dumbledore had changed and muddied over the years since his death, but, in general, she had considered him a force for good in the world. The thought that he would abandon or consign everyone in the Grey to certain death in the Void just so he could get himself Beyond the Veil made her sick to her stomach. The nausea she had begun feeling upon seeing James Potter was only increasing._

" _And how do we get from Beyond the Veil and into the land of the living?" Dumbledore asked._

" _Isn't there an archway at the British Ministry? I'm assuming it's still there, that would be very convenient, indeed." Grindelwald sounded smug, and Hermione wished she was brave enough to show herself so she could give him the smacking he so clearly deserved. But Grindelwald and Dumbledore were among some of the greatest wizards who had ever lived, and Hermione didn't trust that they wouldn't just kill her on the spot. Dumbledore probably wouldn't even recognize her, so it's not like she could rely on her relationship with her former Headmaster to protect her._

_Hermione slinked away, hopefully without outing herself to the two wizards. She needed now more than ever to figure out a way to get Sirius back to the Grey and dissipate the Grey entirely so that everyone could move Beyond the Veil. Once that was done, then maybe she could converse with Aggie about what could be done to block the arch in the Death Chamber._

* * *

"Fucking reckless, Hermione," Sirius snapped at her early the next morning. "Can't fucking believe that you would do something so bloody stupid!"

"Sirius," Hermione tried to placate him, but he was too angry. She hadn't even had a chance to tell him about the conversation she'd overheard between Dumbledore and Grindelwald. And she knew she had to tell him. Sirius needed to know what the repercussions were. He needed to know of the dangers in the Grey, and Hermione had resolved to tell him immediately.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door to her cabin. "Hope you are both decent!" Harry called from the door as he opened it and came inside. Hermione was still in her dressing gown, Sirius in his sweats as they argued in the living room. Hermione hadn't even had time to begin water for tea or coffee yet.

"I'll make tea," Hermione muttered and left for the kitchen.

"I want coffee!" Sirius shouted after her. She waved her hand, indicating she'd heard.

"Same!" Harry said.

"Bloody nuisances, the both of them," Hermione muttered under her breath.

She flicked her wand at the cooker and filled the teapot with water, setting it to boil as she dug through her cabinet for her French press. How would she make Sirius understand the seriousness of what Dumbledore and Grindelwald were planning? Would he get it if she relayed the conversation? It wasn't just Sirius who was in trouble, but  _everyone_  in the Grey. Harry's parents. Remus. Hermione's stomach rolled again, and she just barely kept her nausea at bay just as the teapot began screaming.

She busied herself making the coffee, trying to keep her hands busy and her mind blank. She wasn't entirely successful, but she levitated the mugs along with a tray of condiments to the small sitting room. Harry and Sirius had their heads together and were in a deep discussion when she came in.

"Thanks, love," Sirius said absentmindedly as he picked up his mug and sipped. Hermione's heart clenched, and she turned to rub her eyes. She wouldn't bloody cry about it this morning. She wondered why Harry was here and worried that it didn't bode well.

"Harry was just telling me his theory," Sirius began.

"The Resurrection Stone," Hermione responded. Sirius' eyebrows rose slightly, but Harry didn't look surprised. He nodded grimly.

"Yes. Sirius said he was able to talk to a few people, and everyone he spoke with had been summoned back by a loved one at some point. I think the Resurrection Stone is what created the Grey."

"And summoning people with it traps them there," Hermione whispered. "That's why Remus is there but Tonks isn't. Who else would we think would be there, but isn't?" Hermione asked.

"Colin Creevey," Harry said, "Lavender Brown, Snape, Pettigrew. None of them are there."

Sirius nodded. "Right, they aren't. But then there are people there who weren't killed in the last two wars. Some in  _very_  old-fashioned dress."

"That would be the Resurrection Stone." Hermione nodded. "Has to be, but, who summoned Dumbledore? Grindelwald? They both died during the war? Who would have had access…?" she trailed off as the realization hit her. She stared at Harry in horror.

Harry, at least, looked sheepish.

"You didn't," Hermione said. She couldn't  _believe_  it of him, but the look on his face said it all. "Merlin, Harry. How could you be so stupid?"

"Like I knew what the consequences were going to be?" Harry half-laughed as if this was all some big fucking joke, and Hermione completely lost her cool.

"That's the point, Harry! You never fucking think about the consequences. Fucking Godric. You bloody Gryffindor wizards. Never fucking thinking!"

"Woah, Hermione, calm down," Sirius said.

"Don't fucking tell me to calm down, Black," Hermione hissed. "Do you know what I overheard last night?"

Sirius shook his head, staring at her with wide eyes. Hermione stood from her spot on the sofa and began pacing the small space. She had to tell them, she knew that, but Merlin, she was so fucking angry at Harry for his stupidity. Even if it was incidental stupidity. It felt like half her life she'd been cleaning up after Harry's stupidity, and suddenly, she was fucking sick of it.

"Dumbledore and Grindelwald are attempting to leave the Grey. By any means necessary. Sacrificing all of the people there if they have to in order to get Beyond the Veil. And after that? They plan to come through the archway in the Death Chamber and walk the earth once again."

"What? No." Harry shook his head. "Dumbledore wouldn't  _do_  that."

"Really?" Hermione asked. "You think he wouldn't? How much did you  _ever_  even know about Dumbledore, Harry?"

"That's not fair, Hermione." Harry stood to face her, and Hermione hated that he towered over her. "Dumbledore believed in the greater good, he wouldn't do something to essentially kill so many souls!"

"You know nothing about Albus Dumbledore and the shit he is capable of." Hermione glared at him. "Or, actually, that's not quite right. You  _should_  know all about it, but you're too fucking blind to see how flawed he truly was, Harry. Merlin, don't you get it? Dumbledore raised you like a sheep for slaughter, and you still defend him!"

"That's not true!" Harry shouted at her. Suddenly, his wand was in his hand and Hermione laughed bitterly.

"You going to hex me, Potter?"

Harry flushed and tucked his wand away again.

"Mate, Hermione, maybe you should cool it," Sirius said, standing between the two friends.

"Sirius, tell Hermione that Dumbledore was a good guy," Harry pleaded with his godfather.

Sirius rubbed the back of his neck. "Wish I could, but I'm with Hermione here."

"What?"

"Dumbledore wasn't the guy you are making him out to be," Sirius sighed. "His overall goal in bringing down Voldemort was good, but the way he went about it? The things he deemed sacrificable? I don't agree with them," Sirius said. His voice was as grave as Hermione had ever heard it. She backed up a little. Perhaps Sirius could get through to Harry where Hermione couldn't. Merlin only knew that this was a conversation someone needed to have with Harry at some point in the last twenty years.

"I know, but he had hard decisions to make. It was war, and some things had to be done in order to win," Harry insisted.

"And if your parents didn't have to die?" Sirius asked. "If Dumbledore knew something that could have saved their lives?"

"But he didn't." Harry shook his head.

"Harry, he knew about the Horcruxes back during the first war," Sirius said.

"What?" Harry breathed. "That's not possible. Why didn't he do anything about them?"

"He didn't know what they were, but he knew  _about_ them. We discussed it quite heavily in the Order at the time."

"Well, there you go then," Harry said.

"Harry." Sirius shook his head and Hermione felt terrible for both of them. Sirius clearly didn't want to have this conversation, and Harry wasn't going to listen to anyone saying  _anything_  about Dumbledore.

"What about Snape?" Hermione asked. "How do you condone what Dumbledore did to him?"

"Snivellus? What does he—"

"Shut up, Sirius," Hermione snapped. "Don't call him that. Not in my presence."

"Sorry." Sirius looked actually contrite for once, and Harry gave them both a considered look that Hermione chose to ignore.

"Harry?" she prompted.

"Snape had it more difficult than most, and Dumbledore did take advantage of him," Harry conceded. "But still, it was a war."

"Fine, forget everyone else," Hermione said. "What about what Dumbledore did to  _you_?"

"Me? He didn't  _do_  anything to me, Hermione."

"Harry. Do you really think that leaving you with the Dursleys was in  _your_  best interests?"

"Of course, the blood wards—"

"Harry, please. The blood wards could be duplicated anywhere. You could have grown up with Sirius and Remus instead of the Dursleys. Dumbledore had it in his power, but he did nothing about it. Hell, he let Sirius rot in jail for a dozen years because it  _suited_  his needs. If Sirius was behind bars then he wasn't checking up on you at the Dursleys. He wasn't under Dumbledore's feet, begging to have you placed in his care. Where you'd actually be cared for.

"No, Dumbledore left you at the Dursleys because it left you vulnerable. You were just begging for someone,  _anyone_ , to look up to when you got to Hogwarts, and then lo and behold, there's Dumbledore, swooping in to take that mantle up."

"No." Harry shook his head. "No, I can't—"

"Harry," Sirius said. "I was innocent. Not given a trial. Dumbledore was Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot. You don't think he could have gotten me a trial?"

A dawning look of horror came over Harry's face, and Hermione felt her heart lurch for her friend.

"Harry, I'm sorry, but you have to realize, Dumbledore isn't the knight in shining armor that you seem to think he is. You need to know so you don't get your hopes up. Sirius has to go back to the Grey, regardless of anything else that happens, and hopefully back to Beyond the Veil. But regardless of any of that, we have to stop Dumbledore and Grindelwald, or we're consigning your parents, Sirius, Remus and everyone else in the Grey to soul-death in the Void."

"Not only that," Sirius said. "But whatever Dumbledore and Grindelwald are doing, they're making the Grey unstable."

"What does that mean?" Harry asked.

"It means the Void will overtake the Grey and take everyone in the Grey with it. We have to stop it," Hermione said. "No matter what it takes, we have to stop it."


	9. Convergence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Thank you to the lovely BirdieMing for her beta work! Sorry this is a day late, yesterday just got away from me. I have a feeling ya'll are going to like this chapter though! ;-)**
> 
> **And I apparently don't say this enough, but thank you so much for all your reviews! I read each and every one of them and the ones I've gotten on this story have been so freaking amazing. So thank you, thank you, thank you!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_She sees_

_in black and white_

_thinks in greys_

_but loves in color_

_-JM Storm_

* * *

_June 2022_

* * *

A week later, someone knocked on the door to Hermione's cottage early, before she was due to leave for work.

"Who the bloody hell could that be?" Sirius mumbled over his coffee mug.

Hermione shrugged and went to answer the door. A very sheepish looking Harry stood there. "Can I come in?"

Hermione smiled tightly and stepped aside to allow him into the house.

"Sirius." Harry nodded to his godfather. Sirius didn't have any of it and wrapped Harry into a hug. Hermione smiled sadly at the sight. The whole situation made her depressed. She didn't want to fight with Harry about it, but she needed him to be realistic because Hermione knew that when it was time for Sirius to go back, she was going to be a mess. She assumed Harry would be too; she remembered sixth year all too well.

"I'm sorry," Harry said, looking at both Hermione and Sirius once she sat him at the table with his own mug of coffee.

"Harry, I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that," Hermione said.

Harry laughed ruefully. "Probably not, but that doesn't mean I didn't deserve it. Besides, I think it's clear  _you_  have the harder job of the two of us. I—I feel like an idiot for using the Resurrection Stone on Dumbledore and Grindelwald."

"Dumbledore I understand," Sirius said, "but Grindelwald? What's the deal there?"

"You probably never read Rita Skeeter's book:  _The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore_ ," Hermione chuckled. "Apparently Dumbledore and Grindelwald knew each other in their youth."

"Really? What happened? Dumbledore defeated Grindelwald. It's what made him the greatest wizard alive."

"Dumbledore's sister died. They had a falling out over the circumstances surrounding her death. I'll see if I can dig up a copy, the whole thing is a mess," Hermione told him.

"So they knew each other," Sirius mused.

"More than that," Harry said. "I think they were in a relationship with each other."

"Really?" Hermione asked. "What makes you say that?"

"Just the feeling I got when I summoned them both." Harry shrugged. "I really didn't think that using the Resurrection Stone would have such severe consequences."

Hermione's heart wrenched. She'd laid the blame for this whole situation at Harry's feet, but she knew it wasn't entirely his fault. "Harry, I think the issues with the Grey are my fault."

"What do you mean?" Sirius asked.

"What do you remember from before the Unseelie King came to see you?" Hermione asked him.

"Nothing. Just being in that empty grey space all by myself."

"And after?"

"I began dream-walking into the Grey, and it was populated."

"Exactly," Hermione said. "I think the spell I spoke, to call forth my 'Magical Guardian,' is what made everyone in the Grey wake up, for lack of a better term. I don't think it was your fault at all, Harry. I think it's mine. If I hadn't spoken the spell, Sirius and everyone else in the Grey would essentially be asleep. Which, yes, is not the afterlife they would want, I'm sure, but it also wouldn't have Dumbledore and Grindelwald scheming to make it unstable."

"Godric," Harry breathed. "That's…that's a lot of weight to carry on your shoulders, Hermione."

Hermione looked down at the coffee mug clutched in her hands. It was weighing on her more and more as time went by. Something had to be done, and she was worried about what it would ultimately come down to. 

* * *

_June 2022_

* * *

Sirius had spent most of the last eight months going through the Unseelie King's grimoire and translating what he could. Hermione had held off reading his translations as much as possible, in order to try and puzzle it all out at once. In the meantime, she had been looking into the complexities of death, death magic, and the faery world. She'd been back to visit Maggie a handful of times, attempting to figure out a way to fix the Grey without calling the Unseelie King. It was looking less and less likely, so her last visit with Maggie had been a briefing on how to summon one of the fae. They planned to meet again in a few weeks to discuss summoning the Unseelie King.

"I think I'm done," Sirius said as he leaned back into the visitor's chair in Hermione's office.

"Done?" Hermione asked, not looking up from the treatise she was reading on how to make magic work Beyond the Veil.

"Translating the grimoire."

"Really?" That made Hermione look up from her work. She searched Sirius' face to see it as serious as she'd ever seen it. "You don't look pleased about it."

"No, I am," Sirius sighed. "It's just, it feels like you are trying to get rid of me. And—"

"Sirius," Hermione cut him off. "I'm not trying to get rid of you because you're  _you_. I'm trying to fix what  _I_  fucked up in the first place, and hopefully fix what the Resurrection Stone fucked up too. It's not you. You're…"

"What?" Sirius asked, though he didn't meet her gaze.

_Perfect_ , fluttered through Hermione's mind, but she knew she couldn't say that. She shook her head. "You're an unfortunate side product," Hermione whispered. She knew it was a terrible thing to say even as she said it, but the way she felt about Sirius was now so much closer to love that she was terrified of opening herself up to him. How would she live with herself if she fell in love—or acknowledged that fact—and then had to send Sirius back to the afterlife? It would tear her heart out of her chest, and she may never recover from it. She vowed to harden her heart further, even if it meant hurting Sirius.

Sirius' snort was bitter. "Well, tell me how you really feel, cougar."

Hermione pursed her lips and looked down at her hands. They were in her lap, twisted in her robes, and she willed herself to relax. "The Grey is the problem I am trying to fix," she said slowly. "I…having you here these last few months, I don't regret it, Sirius. I really don't."

"I sense a 'but' coming," Sirius said. Hermione finally met his gaze.

"But I know that you aren't here for good. I've been saying it for months, and the closer we get to figuring this thing out, the closer we get to the day where you won't be here anymore. I'll be here. By myself."

"Oh, Hermione." Sirius stood from his chair and moved around her large desk. He knelt beside her, pulling her hands from her lap and holding onto them.

"I don't want to leave. I think we need to find a way to keep me here," Sirius said. "I've been looking for it, actually."

"I know you have, but it's not the natural order of things. I'm worried that if you stay, something bigger, something worse will be fucked up, and this has been hard enough. We're going to have to summon the Unseelie King for Merlin's sake."

"Right, so why don't we ask him for a boon then?" Sirius asked.

"You can't be serious," Hermione said. The words were out before she had time to think about them and at Sirius' smirk, she groaned.

"Oh, but I am."

"Sirius," Hermione said. "We can't  _owe_  a boon to the Unseelie King! Who knows what he'd ask for in return. It's too dangerous." Hermione shook her head. She pulled her hands from Sirius' and pushed her chair back so she could stand. "We should leave for the day. Leave the grimoire for tomorrow."

"Right," Sirius stated, and Hermione felt like she'd once again hurt his feelings. Merlin, this whole situation was getting too complicated. It was becoming a virtual minefield, and she didn't know how she would ever be able to survive it. 

* * *

_June 2022_

* * *

A few days later, Sirius and Hermione returned to the cottage after dinner with the Potters. More than a little libation had been served as it would be the last one they could have before the children came back from Hogwarts. Hermione giggled when she stumbled out of the Floo and directly into Sirius' back.

"Sirius! Gotta move outta the fireplace," Hermione scolded, although she wasn't truly upset. She still had a hand on one of his firm shoulders, her face shoved against the black leather of his jacket. "Although this is kinda nice," she murmured.

She could feel Sirius laughing, and she blushed. She should remove herself from his person. Her crush on him was becoming ridiculous and while he joked with her, Hermione was sure he didn't feel the same way.

Suddenly, Sirius spun on his heel and caught Hermione just as she stumbled back from him. His hands were around her waist and she found her own hands had settled high on his chest.

"Hermione," Sirius said lowly, his eyes flicked back between her eyes and her lips, and Hermione had to bite her bottom lip to keep from surging forward and kissing him. She desperately wanted to, but there really hadn't been anyone since Ron, and it was just the alcohol. Surely, it was just the alcohol that made Sirius look like he was going to kiss her.

Hermione closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Then, quicker than she thought possible, Sirius' lips were pressed to hers. Hermione couldn't stop the light moan from releasing from her throat when his soft lips connected to hers. He nipped at her bottom lip, and Hermione opened to his tongue. He tasted of Ginny's roast beef and the Firewhisky he had drunk with dinner. It was divine, and soon, Hermione found herself pressed against him, her arms around his shoulders, and her hand threading through his hair.

"Hermione," he groaned as he began kissing down her jaw toward her neck.

It broke Hermione from her daze, and she jumped back from Sirius. She stared at him with wide, horrified eyes.

"We can't." Hermione shook her head.

Sirius sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Then he surprised Hermione by pulling out two vials. She looked at them curiously, not recognizing the potion inside.

"Sober-Up," Sirius said. "I know you have doubts, and the alcohol likely doesn't help, but fuck, Hermione, I want you. I've wanted you for months. Let me prove it to you," Sirius pleaded. He stepped forward and flicked each vial open, then pressed one into her hand. He downed his, and Hermione followed suit. She shuddered as it worked its way through her system, and suddenly, she was sober as a judge.

"We can't," she repeated.

Sirius stepped into her space again and brushed a lock of hair out of her face. "Just kiss me once, and let's see how we feel."

"Sirius," Hermione whined. Merlin, did she want him to kiss her again, but this would mess with everything.

"We can stop if you truly want to," Sirius said, "but I know you want me too, Hermione. I'm not blind. And, if I'm really going to be sent back to the afterlife—I know you have that planned for me—then I want to do this at least once."

Suddenly, she found she didn't care about the consequences. She desperately wanted him and had for months. Didn't she deserve to have this with him—joy—if only for a moment?

Instead of answering him, she pushed up onto her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his once more. He wrapped his arms around her again, and this time he tasted like the Sober-Up potion. She deepened the kiss by pressing her tongue into his mouth. Sirius grabbed her by the back of the neck, and Hermione felt as though her body had completely melted into his. Suddenly, she was desperate to feel his skin and began pushing his leather jacket from his shoulders. He was in just a t-shirt underneath, and they broke the kiss to pull it over his head. Hermione ran her hands down his firm chest, touching each of his tattoos in turn as Sirius pushed her robes from her shoulder and lifted her jumper. Hermione helped him pull it off her before leaning forward to lick one of his flat nipples.

"Merlin," Sirius growled and flicked her bra open, pulling the straps down her arms and tossing it over his shoulder. He reached out and cupped a breast in each hand, thumbing the nipples. Hermione gasped and arched her back at the touch. Godric, that felt so good.

Sirius dropped his head and engulfed one nipple into his hot mouth, and Hermione's knees threatened to buckle. She gripped his shoulders and slid her hands down his strong back. Sirius gathered her close, pressing his hips into hers.

"Bedroom," Hermione gasped, and Sirius slowly pulled off her breast, giving her nipple one last kiss before straightening. He grinned at her and then swept her up in his arms to carry her through the cottage.

Hermione laughed at his antics and squealed when he dropped her unceremoniously on the bed. Sirius made quick work of her denims and knickers before kicking off his own while Hermione worked on taking off her shoes and socks. Within moments, Sirius was climbing over her on the bed, and Hermione welcomed him with open arms. He was lithe and beautiful and Hermione felt herself get more aroused at the sight. Desire pooled in her belly, and she wrapped her legs around him as he settled into the vee of her thighs.

"Gorgeous," Sirius breathed as he took her in. Hermione felt herself blush. She was old, and had birthed two babies, she was far from gorgeous.

"No, truly you are," Sirius said, and he dropped his head to press a kiss to her lips again. Hermione pulled him down more firmly on top of her and groaned as his cock slid through her wet folds. Sirius moaned in response, and Hermione couldn't stop herself from rolling her hips, which made Sirius' cock rub along her clit.

"Oh, Merlin," Hermione breathed. "That feels so good."

"It'll feel better in a moment, love," Sirius smirked. He kissed her hard and pulled back far enough to slide inside her. Hermione bucked her hips, helping him slide as far as he could go. He leaned his forehead against hers as they panted together for a moment.

"You're right." Hermione nodded slightly. "This is better. But now you gotta move."

"Alright." Sirius took a deep breath and slowly slid out and back in. It was such a slow, sensual move that Hermione's eyes rolled to the back of her head and her back arched, trying to feel all she could of him. She ran her hands down his back, digging her nails into the skin she found there in a bid to get him to move faster.

"Going to do this right," Sirius breathed as he dropped his head to kiss along her jaw and down her neck.

"What do you mean?" Hermione practically whined as he slowly slid in and out again. It felt so incredibly good, as though he were burning himself into her skin, but at the same time she just wanted him to move faster, faster, faster.

"I'm going to make love to you, Hermione. So that you never forget me, so that you never forget this." Sirius punctuated that statement with a sharp thrust of his hips that had Hermione seeing stars.

"Oh, Godric," she groaned. "Yes, please. I want that too."

"Good," Sirius growled into her ear, making her shiver. He bracketed her head with his arms and applied himself to his appointed task as Hermione held on tight. Just as her orgasm was about to wash over her, Sirius pulled back onto his knees. He pulled Hermione up by her arms until her legs were wrapped around his waist and his cock was buried inside her once more. This put them face-to-face in a way they hadn't been earlier.

"Oh, Merlin," Hermione murmured as she stared into Sirius' mercurial grey eyes. Sirius' lips twitched into a smirk, and then he began to move. Hermione arched her back, and Sirius wrapped his arms around her tightly to hold her to him. She had her own arms around his neck and pulled him into a deep kiss, matching what their bodies were doing with their tongues. It was the single most sensual thing Hermione had ever experienced, and it wasn't long until Sirius was sneaking a hand between them to brush at her clit.

"Not going to last," Hermione groaned as he teased her clit in just the way she needed to come.

"That's the point, love," Sirius said, kissing along her neck once more. Hermione ground onto Sirius furiously, chasing down the orgasm that was threatening right at the edges of her awareness. "That's it. Come for me, Hermione."

Hermione groaned and arched her back as her pleasure swept through her. Sirius bit down on her neck and groaned with her as he spilled himself deep inside her. Hermione had never finished at the same time as anyone before and found it entirely too erotic. Sirius was still buried inside her when she brought her lips to his in a heated kiss.

"Can't get enough of me, eh?" Sirius joked when she pulled away to kiss his cheeks.

"That's your cock twitching inside me," Hermione said huskily, rolling her hips once more.

Sirius laughed. "I might have been able to go again immediately if I were twenty years younger."

"I like you this age," Hermione said, kissing his lips again. They disentangled themselves so they could lie on the bed. Hermione hummed as Sirius grasped her hand in his and began playing with her fingers.

"Who'd you lose your virginity to?" Sirius asked.

Hermione laughed. "Isn't this supposed to be the discussion we have  _before_  we sleep with each other?"

Sirius shrugged. "Maybe. Still?"

"Ron, of course. Did you really think it would be anyone different?"

He shrugged again. "No idea, thought maybe it could have been Harry."

She laughed again. "Oh, Merlin no, Harry's like a brother to me."

"That's a relief," Sirius responded. "I won't lie. I was a little concerned I was following in my godson's footsteps and that's…"

"You worry about the strangest things," Hermione said, pillowing her head on his chest. "Even if Harry and I had slept together, it would have been over two decades ago! He and Ginny are celebrating their twentieth anniversary this year."

Sirius wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him more snugly, and Hermione reveled in the contact. She traced the tattoos on his chest with her fingers as she felt his body loosen up, and he slowly dropped into sleep. She doesn't want to think about it, but the thought of him leaving now, after this, makes her heart want to break in two. She closed her eyes, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. She was able to keep them back, but just barely.

When she woke up the next morning, she knew for certain. When it was time for Sirius to go, it was going to kill her.


	10. Presentiment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: Many thanks to BirdieMing for her beta work! Again, thank you to each of you dear readers who has reviewed this work! The response has been overwhelming and lovely. Thank you!**
> 
> **If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_He found the colors to paint her_

_where the world had left her grey._

_-Atticus_

* * *

_July 2022_

* * *

Hermione brewed a triple batch of the Dream-Walking Inducement. She wasn't going to let Sirius face that alone every night anymore. Thus far, she had only done it once and appeared next to Sirius. It made her wonder whether she would appear next to Sirius every time. Would it be possible to do this on the sly? She doubted it, but the idea intrigued her.

Even given the new turn in their relationship, Hermione still felt uncomfortable sharing more of herself with Sirius. She felt like she needed to protect him while she still had that ability. She recognized that this feeling wasn't healthy, but it felt necessary. It felt like an inevitability.

Hermione sighed as she downed the potion in the bathroom. Sirius had taken to sleeping in bed with her since that night a few weeks ago when they'd finally had sex. Hermione loved curling up in his arms; she felt so safe and secure there, although she knew tonight she was in for a night of very little sleep.

"Ready for bed, love?" Sirius asked. He was lounging on his side of the bed in a pair of ridiculous red silk trousers.

"What are you wearing?" Hermione laughed upon seeing him.

"Like them? Thought they'd spice things up." Sirius wiggled his eyebrows at her, and Hermione dissolved into giggles as she crawled onto the bed with him.

"Not sure we need them to 'spice things up' as you say. Things seem pretty spicy to me already," Hermione said huskily as she ran a hand down his firm chest, tweaking one of his flat nipples as she went.

"Hermione," Sirius groaned, arching his back once her hand reached the waistband of his ridiculous trousers to find his cock was already hard beneath them.

"My, my." Hermione smirked. "Someone has been a naughty boy."

"Gonna punish me?" Sirius panted when she began stroking her hand up and down his cock.

"Mmm, maybe," Hermione hummed. She placed a kiss on the center of his chest and slowly kissed her way down his abdomen until she was kneeling between his legs. He lifted his hips as she drew the trousers down his legs. She placed a closed mouth kiss to the tip of his cock, and it twitched in her hand. Sirius threaded his fingers into her hair, holding it off her face as she slowly licked down his shaft.

"Love," Sirius panted.

"Hmmm," Hermione hummed, her lips slowly encasing one ball and then the other. Sirius grunted, and his hand tightened in her hair. She stopped torturing him and engulfed his cock in her mouth, sinking down as far as she could go and using her hand on the rest.

"Fuck," Sirius gasped.  _That wasn't going to be in the cards tonight,_ Hermione thought to herself. She needed Sirius to get off quickly so that the Dream-Walking Inducement wouldn't wear off before Hermione could get to sleep.

She hollowed her cheeks as she slid her mouth up and down his cock. Sirius was making incoherent noises and practically thrashing on the bed beneath her. She hummed around him and slid her mouth down as far as she could, swallowing around the tip of his cock.

"Godric, Hermione!" Sirius shouted as he came down her throat. Hermione swallowed it all, working his cock as it twitched in her mouth. She finally pulled away with a last kiss to the tip.

"That was…" Sirius trailed off as if he had no words.

"Spicy enough for you?" Hermione teased.

"Come here, witch," Sirius growled, pulling her up to him. He pressed his lips to hers in a fierce kiss, and Hermione smiled into it.  _Merlin, she loved him_ , she groaned mentally as the thought registered, and she shut her eyes tightly trying to push that very dangerous thought aside.

She snuggled into his arms, and it didn't take long for her to be asleep.

_When she woke up, she was standing next to Sirius in the Grey. The mist swirled around their feet, and Hermione could just make out a few figures in the distance._

" _Are you fucking kidding me, Hermione?" Sirius snapped when he saw her. He gripped her arm above her elbow tightly, turning her so that she faced him. "Is that what tonight was about?"_

" _I'm not letting you do this by yourself," Hermione said. "And I can't know what Dumbledore and Grindelwald are up to if I'm not here figuring things out."_

" _The Grey is getting fucking dangerous," Sirius hissed. "You don't even know how dangerous it is. You can't be here."_

" _Too late," Hermione said. "And if it's dangerous, then all the more reason for me to be here. I need to figure out how to get everyone out of here and Beyond the Veil before they all wind up in the Void," Hermione hissed._ _ **Including you,**_ _she thought._

" _Damn it, Hermione," Sirius complained._

" _Sirius, I'm staying. There's nothing you can do to stop me."_

" _Except throw out your Dream-Walking Inducement," Sirius muttered under his breath. "Or shag you so long every evening it doesn't work," he added louder with a small smirk._

_Hermione slapped his shoulder playfully. "Get your mind out of the gutter. We have work to do, or I do anyway."_

" _Work? What are you planning?" Sirius asked with a frown._

" _I want to see if I can investigate the 'edges' of the Grey. I want to see if it ends, or if it goes on forever."_

" _Why?"_

" _I have to think that it's not an infinite space. The only people here are the ones who've been brought back by the Resurrection Stone, so it can't be that big. So how did it come into being? Just the magic of the Resurrection Stone? Something else? Additionally, what does the Unse—" Hermione cut herself off. "Er, you know, have to do with this?"_

" _We'll talk about him earthside," Sirius said and rubbed the stubble on his jaw. "I have some ideas about him."_

" _Alright. Well, the point about the boundary of the Grey stands," Hermione said._

" _I'm coming with you," Sirius responded. Hermione raised an eyebrow at that._

" _Are you sure? You could spend time with James and Remus. I wouldn't mind."_

" _No," Sirius said, shaking his head. "My responsibility is to you. I'm your Magical Guardian, remember?"_

_Hermione nodded. "Alright then, let's go."_

_Hermione turned and walked away from where the people seemed to be congregating. It would make sense for them to gather near the middle of the Grey, so she wanted to see the edges. Sirius caught up with her and slipped his fingers into hers, and Hermione smiled when he gave her hand a squeeze. She squeezed back._

" _You don't think it'll just… end, do you?" Sirius asked. Hermione stopped short. She hadn't actually thought about it, but the idea of stepping off into the Void horrified her._

" _Alright, new plan," she said and conjured a long stick. "We tap the ground in front of us to be sure that we aren't about to step off the edge."_

" _Okay," Sirius breathed slowly, and Hermione knew he was nervous. She was too and she squeezed his hand again, trying to be reassuring._

_They walked for about twenty minutes until the never-changing landscape seemed to be changing ahead of them. The grey mist rose higher, at a ninety-degree angle._

" _That looks like a wall," Sirius said._

" _It does." Hermione nodded, but then the wall in front of them_ _ **twisted.**_ _Hermione had no other words for it. The wall twisted away from them and down. The ground they were standing on seemed to begin sloping as well._

_There was a figure who seemed to appear out of nowhere in front of them. She was on the floor, which was sliding quickly toward the twisting wall._

" _Ma'am!" Sirius called out. She looked over her shoulder in terror. She was dressed in Victorian-era garb, and Hermione watched in horror as she seemed to slide up the wall, screaming as she clung to the wall. The Void was twisting the wall harder, and the woman began crawling back down to the ground. The Void was getting closer, although she and Sirius hadn't moved. Suddenly, the blackness disappeared entirely and the most gorgeous, lush, green garden appeared. It was so beautiful and bright after the dimness of the Grey and the absolute blackness of the Void that it was hard for Hermione to look at._

" _Beyond the Veil," Sirius breathed upon seeing it. It was as if he instinctively knew what it was and began moving toward it. Hermione gripped his hand tighter, pulling him to a stop._

" _I don't think you should go that way," Hermione whispered. Suddenly the lush landscape disappeared and the inky blackness of the Void was back._

_The woman standing perpendicular to Hermione and Sirius had been attempting to get to the garden, to Beyond the Veil, but it disappeared just as she slid off, and she screamed as the Void sucked her in._

_Hermione was trying to wrap her mind around where the Grey was in relation to both the Void and Beyond the Veil, but it didn't seem to make sense to her._

" _Run," Sirius stated, not moving himself. Hermione looked up to see the Void eating at the Grey. It was creeping toward them, and the weird twisting wall was almost entirely gone. "Run!" Sirius screamed, then he turned, pulling Hermione with him. They ran as fast as they could, but every time Hermione looked over her shoulder it seemed as if the Void never got any further away. In fact, it seemed to get closer._

_She and Sirius didn't run into anyone else either. Had they somehow gotten into a portion of the Grey that didn't work? Where was everyone? Suddenly, Hermione was terrified that they were going to be trapped there, that everyone else in the Grey had moved forward while she and Sirius were doomed to be here forever, always running from the Void that was inching closer and closer._

" _Are we even moving?" she asked at one point, panting as her side began to pain her._

" _Don't think," Sirius grunted. "Just run. We'll wake up soon."_

_Hermione wondered how he could be so sure, but she didn't stop running. She wasn't going to risk anythi—_

Hermione sat up in bed so fast her head swam with dizziness. She was sweating and panting. Sirius groaned next to her, and then he too sat up quickly.

"What the fuck was that?" Sirius asked. The horror in his voice made Hermione shiver violently.

"Do you think…" She couldn't finish the question. Was anyone even still  _in_  the Grey after that?

"I don't know," Sirius whispered. "I…we'll have to find out tonight."

Hermione nodded. "I think this was Dumbledore and Grindelwald's doing."

"How can you be sure?" Sirius asked.

"Their conversation I overheard," Hermione said. "They were clearly attempting to break out of the Grey by whatever means necessary. I can only imagine the things they have tried to get it to come down."

"Well, if it is them, we're no match," Sirius replied.

"Then we have to figure out a different way to move people from the Grey to Beyond the Veil," Hermione said.

"How?" Sirius asked.

Hermione shook her head. She had no idea, but she knew she could at least begin researching it. Maybe she'd find something. If not, then the Unseelie King would need to be summoned. However much the idea of it terrified her, the idea of losing Sirius to the Void was worse. She'd agree to any deal the Unseelie King wanted if only to make Sirius safe. 

* * *

_July 2022_

* * *

"Are you sure, 'Mione?" Ron's green floating head asked from her fireplace.

"I am. I'm so sorry, Ron. Tell the kids. I hate to do this, but I think the project will end in a few weeks. I might be able to squeeze some time at the end of August."

"They'll be awfully disappointed," Ron said, frowning slightly.

Hermione grimaced. "I know. I wish I could, Ron, really. But it's at such a delicate stage right now."

"Alright. Make sure you're eating though," Ron said.

Hermione laughed lightly. "I will. Give the kids my love."

"Will do," Ron said before his head disappeared from the flames.

"You didn't have to do that," Sirius said. "We could have taken a break for a week so you can see your kids."

Hermione shook her head. "No. This is more important. The kids will understand. Lives are at stake here, Sirius."  _Including yours,_  she added mentally.

"Right, so where do we start?"

"I need to speak with Ethan Bole again," she said.

"The Death Chamber guy?" Sirius asked.

Hermione nodded. "He might have some leads on how to move people from the Grey and to Beyond the Veil."

Sirius snapped his fingers. "Actually, the grimoire might help with that too."

"Really?" Hermione asked. Sirius had translated the Grimoire, but Hermione hadn't had much of a chance to read it through.

"Yes." Sirius nodded. "There's a whole section on it."

"Well, it's late enough, we should go through it first thing in the morning." Hermione decided that all of her other projects needed to be put on hold until this thing with Sirius was taken care of. She'd have to tell Aggie in the morning. Aggie was already becoming quite irate that Sirius was still around, all these months later. He'd be happy to see her focusing on sending him back. Hermione shook her head. She couldn't think about sending Sirius back anymore. 

* * *

_July 2022_

* * *

The following morning, Hermione dragged Sirius to the Ministry at six. She wanted to get an early start on the grimoire. Sirius grumbled all the while, but the added benefit of the early start-time meant Hermione didn't have to sneak around the Department of Mysteries trying to make sure that nobody saw him.

"Come on." She hurried through the bland corridor to her office as Sirius pouted behind her.

"I could have used another hour or two." He yawned and Hermione rolled her eyes, opening the door to her office and ushering him inside. She filled her teapot with boiling water and set it to steep.

"Alright, let's see what that grimoire says," she said. Sirius moved to her containment box and pulled out both the grimoire and his translations. He flipped through the translations, coming to a stop about halfway through.

"Here." He pushed the translation toward Hermione and as she settled in to read, he moved to the teapot and poured for them both.

"Thanks," Hermione muttered as he placed a cup of tea before her. She read through the passage three times. It seemed simple enough, but it was only to move one person from the Grey to Beyond the Veil. "Do you think it could be adapted for more people?"

Sirius shrugged. "Doesn't seem likely. Not when it needs something from the person you're moving over."

"Which we won't have." Hermione bit her lip. "I'll go see Bole when he comes in. What else is in here?"

"Loads," Sirius said, indicating that she should continue reading.

Hermione turned the book back to the beginning and began reading.

It was hours later when Sirius tapped her shoulder.

"Hey, you should probably try to catch Bole." He nodded to her clock, and Hermione realized that it was nearly the end of the day already.

"Oh, yeah. Stay here." She stood from her desk, her back creaking and her knees sore. She hobbled a few steps before everything began working again, and she slipped out of her office door. The Unseelie King's grimoire was fascinating. Hermione couldn't believe how much time had gone by while she'd read it. She was a little over halfway through it and wondered how late Sirius would let her stay.

She knocked on Ethan's door just as he was about to leave for the day.

"Hermione! What brings you by?" Ethan asked as he stepped back, allowing her to enter his office.

"I was actually hoping you could help with some reference materials, but if you're leaving…"

"Nonsense, I'd be happy to help."

"I'm looking for something on moving souls to Beyond the Veil," Hermione said.

"Does this have anything to do with what you asked about last fall?" Ethan asked with a frown.

"I still can't talk about it," she said, biting her lip.

"I understand." Ethan nodded solemnly. He flicked his wand and several books from the bookshelf behind his desk floated forward and stacked themselves before Hermione. "These should get you started. Let me know if you need more."

"Thanks, Ethan," Hermione said as she gathered the books in her arms and left his office.

She spent the next two weeks going through everything Ethan had given her. It all lined up with what was in the grimoire, but without the mention of the Grey. Every ritual she found to move an individual's soul to Beyond the Veil all needed something from the person in order to do it. There was no way she was going to be able to save everyone. The thought plagued her night and day. When she wasn't sleeping, she was dream-walking with Sirius. There was no way she was going to let him go back to the Grey on his own after they'd watched the Void begin to eat it. The Grey was getting worse. The fluctuations between the Void and Beyond the Veil at the outer rims were almost constant. A blinding, flashing light as they flipped back and forth, back and forth between the two.

The people stuck in the Grey were beginning to panic, although Hermione hadn't run into Dumbledore or Grindelwald again. The fluctuations on the outer rims were all anyone was talking about, even if you couldn't quite see them from the middle portion where people tended to congregate.

Hermione hated the fact that she wasn't going to be able to save everyone. She'd forbidden Sirius from discussing it with James and Remus beyond telling them that they were working on it.

After two weeks of this, Sirius made her take a break. He pulled her from her office and guided her home.

"Sirius, I can figure this out. If I can figure out how to just move two or three people at once—"

"Shut up," Sirius said with a small smile. He pressed a kiss to her lips and Hermione stiffened, suddenly uncomfortable with the easy intimacy Sirius was offering. His lips were insistent though and soon she found herself loosening up, just a little. He slipped his tongue into her mouth and she groaned. Suddenly, she couldn't get enough. All she wanted was Sirius. His taste. The feel of his hands on her waist. The feel of his hair beneath her fingertips. The way his breath hitched as she bit his bottom lip. She wanted it all.

"Take me to bed," Hermione whispered when Sirius began kissing her jaw. He nipped her earlobe.

"With pleasure," he hissed, and Hermione's knees melted at the feeling of his hot breath as it swept across her sensitive ear.

Sirius growled and picked her up, cradling her bridal style. Hermione clung to his neck, pressing kisses to his bearded cheek and neck. She twirled her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, and when he set her on her feet in her bedroom, she pushed his leather jacket from his shoulders. His t-shirt went next, and then she knelt to begin unbuttoning the placket of his trousers. She pushed them and his pants down his hips, and Sirius yanked her up by her upper arms.

He undressed her swiftly and pushed her onto the bed. Hermione bounced a little before Sirius covered her body with his. He was so warm. Hermione shivered as the scent of him swept around her. Sirius groaned as he kneeled between her legs, his cock resting on her lower belly.

"Sirius," Hermione whispered. "I need you."

"Oh, love," Sirius murmured, burying his face into her neck as he guided himself inside. Hermione cried out as he slid through her hot flesh. He felt so good, so right, inside her that she couldn't believe that she'd waited so long to do this with him. She'd made him wait so long too. It wasn't fair. None of this was fair and it made her want to throw a tantrum. Instead, she rolled them, so Sirius was on his back and she was sprawled along his chest. She knelt, pressing her hands to his firm chest, tracing the tattoos there as she rocked her hips.

"Feel so fucking good, Hermione," Sirius groaned. "The way your cunt grips my cock should be a sin."

"It's perfect," Hermione replied. "The way your cock fills me up is fucking perfect. And I never want it to end."

Sirius slipped a hand down from her waist to thumb her clit, and Hermione keened as she fell over the edge of her orgasm. Sirius grunted but didn't come. Hermione rocked her hips, riding her orgasm out, before collapsing onto his chest.

"Sorry," she murmured. "Not as young as I used to be."

Sirius laughed. It was low and made Hermione's blood sing. "Not to worry love, although I'm not done yet." He pushed her off of him. She whined when he slid out of her but allowed him to turn her to her side, pulling her back to his chest. He lifted her leg over his hip and slid back inside.

"Oh, Merlin," Hermione groaned. This angle had him hitting the front of her cunt, right at the place inside that was impossible for her to reach on her own and made her see stars every time he pushed inside.

"Like that, eh?" Sirius murmured. He kissed her neck, and Hermione reached an arm around to grasp his arse in her hand, urging him on.

"Feels so good," Hermione said. "Can't even describe how good this is."

"Heaven," Sirius said. "Feels like nirvana."

Hermione nodded and Sirius slid his hand over her hip, reaching for the sensitive spot between her legs. His fingers slid around her clit, pulling at it slightly, and Hermione's back arched as she came again. Sirius followed with a low groan into her shoulder and Hermione bit her lip. That sound was enough to make her aroused all over again.

They both laid there for several moments, enjoying their post-coital bliss. Hermione felt languid, and she stretched in Sirius' arms, turning over to face him once more.

"Thank you," she murmured into his chest, kissing along the muscle she found there. She slid her hand across one of his nipples and was pleased when he hissed.

"I'm an old man, Hermione," Sirius grunted when she flicked his nipple again.

"I know," Hermione said. "I can be patient."

Sirius growled when Hermione's hand slid below the sheet at his waist and found him half-hard.

"Not so old then," Hermione teased.

"Not so old, cougar," Sirius teased back, rolling Hermione to her back as she giggled up at him. When she finally figured out how to send Sirius back, Hermione knew her heart would be irreparably broken. But she would enjoy what she had first.


	11. Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: This is the penultimate chapter. Look for the final chapter next week. This fic wouldn't be what it is without the lovely and talented BirdieMing. Thanks to msmerlin for her work on the earlier chapters. And as usual, brownlark42 was a huge part of the alpha process and getting me to start writing this fic again.**
> 
> **And you, dear reader, thank you for reading and reviewing. Each comment is lovlier than the last. If you loved this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway.**

_Dreams in the dusk,_

_Only dreams closing the day_

_And with the day's close going back_

_To the grey things, the dark things,_

_The far, deep things of dreamland._

_-Carl Sandburg_

* * *

_August 2022_

* * *

Hermione was quite sure dream-walking nightly was going to kill her. She was barely getting three hours of sleep each night at this rate. The Grey was getting worse each successive night, and Hermione was worried that they would lose more people before she could figure out a solution.

"Perhaps we should start sending people across," Sirius suggested one evening.

"I thought of that," Hermione sighed heavily as she sank onto the bed next to him. He began rubbing her shoulders and Hermione groaned her appreciation. "I'm worried we'd start a panic if people just began to disappear. And what if Dumbledore and Grindelwald find out about it?"

Sirius didn't respond, but Hermione was sure he was frowning. "What happens if we don't figure something out?"

Hermione sighed again. "I'm going to summon the Unseelie King this weekend."

"When were you going to tell me?" Sirius asked. Hermione knew he wasn't truly upset by the faint amusement in his voice.

"I'm telling you now. I don't see any other solution for it, but I've never summoned anyone before—"

"Except me," Sirius interrupted.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Except you. So I want to talk to Maggie Harris again before I do anything. I'm hoping to see her tomorrow."

"Maybe you shouldn't dream-walk with me tonight, then?" Sirius suggested. "Get some needed sleep."

"I've called into work for the next few weeks," Hermione said. "I didn't want to tell you, but I brought the Grimoire home and, well… I'm not going back to work until I have a solution or…" She swallowed heavily. "I've failed," she whispered.

"You won't fail," Sirius said sternly. "You're the brightest witch I've ever met. You couldn't fail if you  _tried_."

Hermione smiled weakly at his attempt to encourage her, but she wasn't convinced.

"Let's go to bed," Sirius suggested. Hermione nodded and took her Dream-Walking Inducement. She ignored Sirius' scowl and cuddled with him as she waited for sleep to take her. As usual, it was quick.

_The Grey was clearly shrinking. Hermione and Sirius always seemed to appear at the same spot when they dream-walked: seemingly in the center of the Grey. That night, they could see the edges of the Grey. The Void and Beyond the Veil flickered rapidly, reality-bending in odd ways that hurt Hermione's eyes._

" _We should try to find Dumbledore," Sirius said from beside her. Hermione nodded. She didn't want to show herself to Dumbledore, but perhaps he wouldn't recognize her. If anyone could slow down the obvious degradation of the Grey, it was Dumbledore._

_Hermione and Sirius clasped hands tightly as they began weaving through the crowd. Because the Grey was shrinking,_ _**everyone** _ _was clustered around the center. People were scared. The snippets of conversation Hermione overheard told her that much. She felt bad for them. They hadn't done anything to deserve being stranded here. Her resolve to summon the Unseelie King strengthened._

_Finally, after what seemed like ages, Hermione spotted Dumbledore. He was wearing the white shroud he'd been buried in, and the sight of it startled her. "There." She pointed through the mist, and Sirius pulled her along._

" _Dumbledore!" Sirius shouted merrily. Hermione was suddenly irritated that they hadn't discussed a plan at all. Sirius was brashly going forward like the Gryffindor he was._

" _Sirius? Sirius Black, is that you?" Dumbledore asked with a smile on his face. Hermione's heart clenched. She hadn't taken the headmaster's death particularly hard all those years ago, but the memory of his death preceded the worst time in Hermione's life._

" _It is! I didn't know you were here, wherever here is," Sirius grinned. He shook Dumbledore's hand, and Hermione spied Grindelwald just behind Dumbledore, listening in on their conversation. She didn't bring attention to the other man and similarly hoped that Dumbledore would ignore her presence. It wasn't to be, however._

" _And Hermione Granger, is that you?" Dumbledore asked her._

" _Granger-Weasley, actually," Sirius supplied with a wink._

" _I'm sorry to see you here," Dumbledore said sadly._

_Hermione nodded but didn't correct his assumption that she was dead. Better for him to not know._

" _I have to ask, Headmaster," Hermione began._

" _Oh, no, I'm not Headmaster. Haven't been for some time," Dumbledore chuckled jovially._

_Hermione smiled weakly, while Sirius laughed as if it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. The man clearly needed lessons in acting. Although, she didn't think she was doing that great of a job either._

" _Sorry, Dumbledore." Hermione felt herself redden. "I wanted to ask about the fluctuations going on. Any chance of stabilizing the environment? I've been attempting to study its mechanics, but haven't had much luck."_

" _I'm afraid not, Mrs. Granger-Weasley. I've tried everything I could do to stabilize the outer edges, but alas, nothing I do has worked." He sounded genuinely remorseful, and Hermione thought that perhaps he was. He hadn't been attempting to eradicate the Grey after all. Just escape it._

" _Is there any hope for us?" Hermione asked._

" _I'm afraid not," Grindelwald finally said, stepping up alongside Dumbledore._

_Sirius eyed the other man but didn't say anything. He was old and didn't much look like the photographs of him from History of Magic, but Hermione would know that voice anywhere. It was the same voice that had been plotting with Dumbledore the first time she had dream-walked in the Grey._

" _That is disconcerting," Sirius said. Hermione eyed the rim of the space again, squinting against the alternate brightness of Beyond the Veil and the utter inky blackness of the Void._

" _Indeed, it is, Sirius," Dumbledore said morosely. "I'm afraid I don't know any more than you do about how we've come to be trapped here."_

" _You don't?" Hermione asked suddenly. She had assumed he would know about the Resurrection Stone, or at least had some idea, but if he hadn't put it together… She peered harder at Dumbledore to try and determine if he was lying._

" _I'm afraid so, Mrs. Granger-Weasley." Dumbledore looked sad, but Hermione thought perhaps he knew more than he was letting on._

" _Have you tried to do anything to stop the fluctuations?" Hermione asked. She was pretty sure that Dumbledore and Grindelwald were responsible for them in the first place in their attempt to break free of the Grey, but she wanted to see if he would lie again._

" _I haven't," Dumbledore sighed. "I'm afraid anything I try may make them worse."_

" _I see," Hermione said. Dumbledore had that false look on his face that made Hermione's skin crawl. He was definitely lying._

* * *

The following morning, Hermione knew what she had to do. Sirius wasn't awake yet, and Hermione let him sleep as she padded to her kitchen to begin the coffee. While it was brewing, she quilled a note to Maggie, asking to meet as soon as possible.

Dumbledore was lying, and Hermione wasn't going to risk everyone in the Grey. She needed to summon the Unseelie King and see what he knew. Hopefully, he knew more than Hermione. She didn't want to contemplate what they would have to do if he didn't. The idea that all of the souls in the Grey might be forfeit to the Void if Hermione didn't fix it made her sick to her stomach. She was barely eating as it was.

Sirius had awoken and gotten into the shower as her owl arrived back with a note from Maggie. She was free that afternoon. Hermione downed the rest of her coffee and went to join Sirius in the shower. She needed all the comfort she could get.

* * *

The visit with Maggie had been informative, although it had done nothing to settle Hermione's nerves. She was planning to summon the Unseelie King after all. Sirius didn't seem concerned about it, but Hermione was terrified.

"It'll be fine," Sirius assured her for the fourth time since they'd left Maggie's. The Unseelie King was best summoned at night in the center of standing stones. Sirius knew of a set near Godric's Hollow, so they planned to do it that night. No sense in waiting.

"You're already dead, Sirius. It'll be fine for you. For me? I'm alive, with children. It's very possible it won't be fine, and my children will be made to pay the price," Hermione snapped.

Sirius sighed heavily. "I wish you wouldn't do that."

"Do what?"

"Act like my experience is less than yours because I died." Sirius glared at her.

Hermione instantly felt guilty. She'd been doing it for months as a way to distance herself from him. She hadn't meant to get close to him. And now she had. And she was still hurting him on purpose. She was an arsehole.

"I'm sorry, Sirius," Hermione whispered. "I… I know I shouldn't and I don't have an excuse. I'm sorry."

"Oh, kitten." Sirius pulled her into a hug. "I know this is hard for you," he whispered into her hair. "I just want you to know that coming to know you over these last few months. I can't even begin to tell you how much they've meant to me."

Hermione smiled into his shoulder even as tears gathered in her eyes. It was the sweetest thing he could have said, and Hermione's heart melted. She didn't want to think about what was going to happen. She just wanted the comfort that Sirius provided.

They stayed that way for several moments, holding each other on the couch in her cottage, soaking up each other and the comfort they provided to the other.

"We should get going," Sirius said finally. "It's getting dark soon, and we've been ready for the ritual for two hours already."

"Right," Hermione whispered. She had no desire to move, but Sirius was right. She gave him one last squeeze, inhaled his scent one last time before reluctantly standing from the couch.

Hermione picked up her trusty beaded bag, the same one she carried during the war, this time filled with everything they'd need for the ritual to summon the Unseelie King. Sirius held the door open as he guided her out. Then he wrapped his arms around her tightly and Side-Along Apparated her to a set of standing stones in the forest outside of Godric's Hollow. It was very dark now, and Hermione flicked her wand, lighting several blue-bell fires and placing them at regular intervals on the outside of the stones.

"Outer circle first," Hermione said, digging through her bag and handing a sack of sand to Sirius. Sirius nodded and paced around the outside of the standing stones, leaving a circle of sand in his wake.

Hermione found the salt and copied Sirius' actions, this time in the very center of the stones, the only circle big enough for a person to stand in.

Once Sirius was done, Hermione surveyed the scene and flicked her wand again. A sheen of fire leapt out of the sand and flickered above their heads, ringing them in entirely.

"Now for the hard part," Hermione said. She and Sirius knelt before the salt circle and clasped hands.

"Lord Mordoc Marfyn, King of the Unseelie. Your humble servants do summon you earthside. We offer salt as our hospitality and fire as protection against outside influences," Hermione intoned.

"King of the Unseelie, Erlking, Lord Mordoc Marfyn, we call you forth earthside. Your humble servants have stowed their weapons and wish only for a palaver," Sirius said.

The salt circle flashed bright red, then blue, before settling into a dull yellow. Another flash and standing in the center of the circle was a creature that Hermione could only stare at, slack-jawed. It had the hooves of a goat but the body of a man. It would have reminded her of a faun from the C.S. Lewis books, but the thing was much more menacing than Mr. Tumnus could ever be. He had the eyes of a goat and a pair of short horns above his head. He towered over both Hermione and Sirius. She dropped her gaze to the salt ring before them.

"Unseelie King," Sirius said, bowing his head. His voice full of a reverence Hermione had never heard before.

"Finally, you call for me," the Unseelie King said. His voice was both wonderful and horrible. It sounded paradoxically of both smooth, deep, honey, and of angry bees buzzing irritably.

"Forgive us, my king," Sirius said. "Were we to have called you earlier?"

"Yes." The Unseelie King did not elaborate.

"I'm afraid that is my fault, my king," Hermione said quietly. "I had been afraid of what you would have to tell us and tried to find a way to fix things on my own."

The Unseelie King stamped his foot, and Hermione flinched. "Up. I won't hurt you."

Sirius stood quickly, pulling Hermione to her feet as well. Their hands were still clasped tightly together, and Hermione was glad for the support.

"Do you think it an accident that my Grimoire landed in your hands, human?" The Unseelie King stared directly into Hermione's eyes with that question. His inhuman yellow gaze was unrelenting, and Hermione wondered if he could read minds like a Legilimens.

"I...I hadn't thought of it, actually," Hermione admitted.

The Unseelie King tossed his head back and laughed, the sound like a cello being played badly. It grated along Hermione's nerves, setting her ears on edge.

"It. Was. Not."

"I apologize, my king," Hermione said quickly. "Please tell me how I may assist you."

"Fix what you have created."

Hermione stared at him dumbly. She had no idea what she had created. What did he mean? The Grey? She didn't know how to fix it.

"The Grey, child," the Unseelie King said. Even Hermione could hear the exasperation in his strange voice, and she flinched.

"I don't know how," Hermione said. "I think I know how the Grey was created, or rather  _what_  created it. But I don't know how to destroy it. It's unstable, and everyone trapped in it will become part of the Void instead of moving on to Beyond the Veil—"

"Quiet," the Unseelie King hissed. Hermione cringed, expecting some sort of blow.

"Gracious King of the Unseelie," Sirius began, "we would be delighted to serve you in any way you see fit. The Grey is unstable. We do not know how to fix it. We think the Resurrection Stone is responsible for the creation of the Grey. That stone has since been lost to time."

"I know nothing of this Resurrection Stone," the Unseelie King said. "I do know that the Grey has impinged upon the Unseelie Court and brought the Void with it. I will not lose the Unseelie Court to the Void because of mistakes made by humans," he hissed.

"I think I can dispatch the Grey," Hermione spoke up, "but I need to know of a way to move more than one soul at a time from the Grey to Beyond the Veil."

The Unseelie King sighed heavily. "Fine. It'll be added to the Grimoire. But do it soon. My patience grows thin." With that pronouncement, the Unseelie King popped out of existence.

Hermione collapsed into Sirius' side, and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders to keep her somewhat upright. He flicked his wand, clearing the ritual space before Apparating them both back to her cottage. Hermione's mind was in overdrive and at the same time so overwhelmed she couldn't think straight.

* * *

_August 2022_

* * *

Hermione invited Ginny and Harry over for dinner. She would be dream-walking for the last time later that night and knew it would be the final chance for them to see Sirius.

Sirius was in denial. Harry too. But Hermione had warned Ginny of what to expect. While there was a small part of Hermione that wished and hoped Sirius would be able to stay, Hermione truly knew what was going to happen. He would be taken with the rest of the souls into Beyond the Veil. Then she would be alone. Again.

She had always been good at compartmentalizing her feelings, and she did so now. She needed to play semi-happy host to Harry and Ginny. Then get ready to say goodbye to Sirius before dream-walking again a final time. Hermione buried her fear and panic and put on a smile as Ginny and Harry stepped out of her fireplace.

"Sirius!" Harry said happily, hugging the man.

"Hope you're hungry, mate," Sirius laughed, patting Harry on the back. "Hermione's been cooking most of the day."

Hermione smiled softly and hugged Ginny when she came into the kitchen to offer help.

"You doing alright?" Ginny asked.

Hermione nodded and smiled tightly. "Of course, Gin."

"Hermione," Ginny said sadly, patting her shoulder. "Come see me when this is over, okay?"

Hermione smiled through her tears and turned abruptly to dab at her eyes. She couldn't cry. It was Sirius' last night.

Pulling the casserole from the oven, Hermione put a lid on everything and pasted on a happy smile.

She didn't let anyone drink that evening; she and Sirius both needed to be clear-headed for later. Dinner was a loud, boisterous affair as it only could be with four Gryffindors around the table. Hermione hadn't laughed like she did during dinner in years, and it felt good. Cathartic even.

There were a few minutes where she'd forgotten entirely what was going to happen later. Reality fell when Harry and Ginny took their leave at almost midnight. Hermione squeezed Harry and Ginny hard. Tears stood in her eyes once more as they both stepped into the fireplace, and Hermione hoped that Harry couldn't see them.

"Ready?" Sirius asked.

"Not quite," Hermione whispered. She turned to him and threw her arms around his neck, pressing a fierce kiss to his lips. She tried to put everything she was feeling into that kiss, trying to convey to him how much she'd come to care for him. Sirius seemed to understand on some part because he guided her back to the bedroom, stripping her as he went. She followed suit, helping him out of his clothes until they fell onto her bed in a tangle of naked limbs.

Their love-making was at times fierce and poignant and perfect. Hermione still wasn't ready to let him go when she donned her nightgown and downed her Dream-Walking Inducement, but she felt that she'd at least given him a proper goodbye.

_When Hermione opened her eyes, she and Sirius were standing in the center of the Grey. It was even smaller than the night before and Hermione knew that if they didn't do the ritual now, there was a chance that the Grey would disappear entirely, allowing the Void to begin eating into the Unseelie Court and consigning all of the souls of the Grey to the Void forever._

" _It's time," Hermione said._

_Sirius squeezed her hand. "Erlking, Lord Marfyn, King of the Unseelie."_

_The only way to perform the ritual was for the Unseelie King to help them. However, calling the Unseelie King in the Grey was considerably easier than calling him on earth. And more dangerous. On earth, he had been confined to the circle of salt. Protecting him from Hermione and Sirius and Hermione and Sirius from him. There was no circle in the Grey._

" _Let us begin," the Unseelie King announced._

_Hermione turned and kissed Sirius fiercely once more. She was unable to stop her tears now. Sirius wiped them away, giving her a crooked grin as he knelt next to her._

" _What's this, then?" Dumbledore asked, pushing his way through the crowd. He stopped short upon seeing the Unseelie King. "What is he doing here? What are you doing? Hermione? Sirius?"_

" _The Grey is unstable," Hermione said. "The King of the Unseelie and I are going to stabilize it and move all of the souls trapped here to Beyond the Veil."_

" _No!" Grindelwald shouted. He, too, was pushing through the crowd, his wand raised._

" _I'm afraid I can't allow you to do that," Dumbledore said. He sounded fake-sad to Hermione and she felt her blood boil. Dumbledore was supposed to be a good wizard, but willingly consigning all of these souls to the Void for his own ambitions showed his true colors._

_The Unseelie King laughed at Dumbledore and Grindelwald. "Silly humans. You have no dominion here." He snapped his fingers and Dumbledore and Grindelwald both disappeared. A sharp fluctuation shook the Grey as the Void shuddered around them._

" _What did you do with them?" Sirius whispered._

" _Into the Void." The Unseelie King shrugged. "If anyone else has objections, they can join them."_

_Hermione felt like vomiting. She may not have liked Dumbledore or Grindelwald, but the Unseelie King had essentially just killed their eternal souls by putting them into the Void. It was called the Void for a reason._

_Sirius squeezed her hand tighter, and Hermione shook herself mentally. She couldn't afford to lose focus._

" _Let's begin," she said deferentially to the Unseelie King. He nodded to her and raised his hands. Hermione was still kneeling at his feet._

_A snap of the Unseelie King's fingers and a circle around the three of them was put into place. Hermione began chanting along with the Unseelie King in Irish, something she had to study phonetically for two days since they'd discovered this ritual in the Grimoire._

_The chanting went on and on, and Hermione kept her eyes cast down, but she could hear small pops as souls left the Grey. The cycling of the Void and Beyond the Veil seemed to have stopped altogether. Finally, Hermione lifted her eyes to see that about half the people were in the Grey and Beyond the Veil was shining brightly beyond the edges. James and Lily Potter gave her a wave as they both popped out of existence. Hermione kept up the chanting. Remus waved as he left as well. Soon it was only Sirius left._

_Hermione's chanting never ended. Even as the tears slid down her cheeks._

" _That's me, love," Sirius said. He pressed a kiss to Hermione's forehead and stood. The Unseelie King opened the circle for him, allowing him to leave. The last glimpse Hermione had of him was him giving her his crooked smile with a small wave._

* * *

Hermione woke and her heart hurt. Breathing hurt. Her head ached and her body felt as though she'd run a marathon. Everything hurt. She'd cried as she slept, and her face was dried and puffy from her tears. She spent two weeks in bed, and when she didn't show up for work at the end of her sabbatical, Harry and Ginny showed up at her cottage.

She'd barely eaten, hadn't even left her bed except to use the bathroom. She'd never felt as desolate as she did now. How was she expected to live without her heart? For Sirius had surely stolen it away with him. Who cared about dusty, old books when Hermione could barely breathe without excruciating pain? Every beat of her heart burned in her chest. Every tear on her cheek was agonizing, and Hermione wanted to die.

Never before had she contemplated suicide. Just the thought of it made her shudder, but now, it seemed perfectly reasonable. How else would she see Sirius again? Her entire being  _needed_  him. Her body craved him. And now, he was gone.

Logically, she had always known he wouldn't be staying. But Hermione's heart wasn't listening to logic these days. It was insisting over and over and over again that it was broken. That  _she_  was broken and nothing would make her whole again. Even the logical side of her brain feared that to be the truth.

"Hermione," Ginny said upon seeing her.

"I miss him too," Harry replied. Between the two of them, they managed to get Hermione up and into the shower. Something she desperately needed. Then they fed her and let her cry some more.

"Come home with us," Harry said. "You need someone to look after you."

"I can't burden you guys," Hermione whispered.

"Nonsense," Ginny said. "Stay with us as long as you need."


	12. Gone Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N: It's the end of a month today and feels like the right day to post this instead of waiting until tomorrow. I want to send big, ginormous, internet hugs to BirdieMing, msmerlin, and brownlark42 for all of their work on various parts of this story. Find the aesthetic for this story on my Tumblr: crochetawayhpff or my Facebook Shan Crochetaway. Thank you, dear readers, for your time and dedication to reading this story. I hope you have enjoyed it.**
> 
> **I didn't get too many reviews after the last chapter, which I am assuming means you aren't happy with me. I apologize, dear readers, if this story didn't turn out the way you expected, however, I did warn you back in chapter 1 that this had an ambiguously happy ending. I do hope a few of you have stuck with me and will let me know your thoughts, good or bad, on this chapter and the story as a whole. Without further ado, I give you the final chapter of The Grey.**

_When you are old and grey and full of sleep,_

_And nodding by the fire, take down this book,_

_And slowly read, and dream of the soft look_

_Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep_

_-W.B. Yeats_

* * *

_November 2057_

* * *

Hermione was slower these days. At seventy-eight, she was no spring chicken in either the wizarding world or the Muggle world. Her children were grown, with children of their own. Molly had died last year, leaving Arthur at the Burrow alone. Hermione spent more time there than she had in years. She'd always liked Arthur, and with Molly gone, it seemed they had something in common. She'd sold her cottage. She hadn't returned after Ginny and Harry coerced her to stay at Grimmauld Place. She felt closer to Sirius at Grimmauld and never left. She had worried about imposing on Harry and Ginny, but they loved having her.

She hadn't been fired from her job in the Department of Mysteries, but she'd taken off almost an entire year before she was ready to go back. And when she was, she left her division and began working in the Death Chamber with Ethan Bole. Ethan had died twenty years ago, leaving Hermione as the senior researcher. She paused on her way up the steps, admiring the view before her. She was at the Wizarding University in Cairo. The library here was magnificent and while Hermione had spent a lot of time inside it over the years, she had spent considerably less taking in the gorgeous building it was housed in. She did so now, although she was just resting her legs in order to continue the climb.

This was the third stop on her nine-stop tour to discuss her latest book,  _The Afterlife: A Study_. She'd become an acclaimed researcher on the study of death, death magic, and the afterlife in the thirty-five years since Sirius had been gone from her life for good. Sirius. She still thought about him almost every day. He was the love of her life, and Hermione hadn't really had anyone since him. Oh, sure, there had been brief affairs, here and there when she was younger, but nothing that lasted. And nothing like Sirius.

Hermione took a deep breath and finished climbing the stairs. Her talk was due to begin within the hour, and she wanted a chance to catch her breath before she became impassioned on the lecture floor.

This was her fourth book tour, so Hermione was an old hand at how these things went. First was the lecture, then a book signing and chatting with her readers. Most of whom were students at the University, although the talk was technically open to the general wizarding public. She thought that perhaps this would be her last book tour. At least her last one overseas. Travel was getting harder for Hermione, and she preferred to stay in England when she could.

Besides, her grandchildren would be off to Hogwarts soon, and she wanted to spend as much time as possible with them.

"Ms. Granger-Weasley, we're so pleased to have you. My name is Ammon Jaber, and I'll be your guide today," a young man greeted her at the front door of the library. He took Hermione's arm and guided her inside. She allowed it, she was tired and refused the cane that Ginny kept forcing into her luggage. She didn't need a cane, except when it was raining and Cairo was exceedingly dry.

"This way," Ammon said, helping her through the corridors. Hermione found herself leaning quite heavily on his help and she sighed. Perhaps she shouldn't have burned the cane Ginny had snuck into her bags.

"Thank you." Hermione nodded to him once she was installed into a small antechamber off the main lecture hall.

"Tea?" he asked and Hermione nodded gratefully. She was dreadfully thirsty, and a cuppa would be just the thing. She hadn't been able to touch coffee since Sirius left. Another permanent change in her life. She often thought of her life as pre- and post-Sirius. It was probably ridiculous, but somehow he had been  _the_  defining character in her life. He'd shaped her long career into what it was now and had left her longing for death. Not since the first days had she considered suicide, but she had often felt resigned over the years. Resigned to living out her life until it was time for her to die and be reunited once more with Sirius. She could only hope that they would be reunited. Thirty-five years was a long time, perhaps he had forgotten her.

Shaking her head at those thoughts, Hermione smiled to Ammon as he brought in a tea service and poured for her.

"I did want to say, Ms. Granger-Weasley, that your treatise on the Unseelie Court was inspired," Ammon said. He had a sort of innocent youth about him that reminded Hermione of Hugo when he was at that age. His brown eyes looked so earnestly into her own.

"And have you attempted any of the rituals?" Hermione asked. Along with her work in the Death Chamber, she'd become a premier expert on the Fae and how they played roles in all cultures.

"Not as of yet." Ammon looked away shyly. "They mostly call for a partner, and I haven't found anyone willing to assist me yet."

"Ah." Hermione nodded. "You should travel to England then. The Wizarding University at Brighton has an entire major on the Fae. I believe their first graduating class in that major will be this year."

"Really?" Ammon was breathless. "I hadn't heard. I'm not sure I can transfer—"

"Bah." Hermione waved her hand. "Owl me and I'll write a reference for you. I might even be able to find a scholarship."

"Oh, Ms. Granger-Weasley, you don't have to do that."

"Nonsense, I'm happy to help young scholars. I insist," Hermione said with so much force that Ammon nodded his head vigorously.

"Thank you! Thank you so much!" He shook her hand, and Hermione smiled at his enthusiasm. While the Fae was interesting, it had never been her primary focus. Death and the afterlife and Beyond the Veil were much more interesting to her.

"It's time." Another aid, this one a woman, poked her head into the small room. Ammon helped lever her up into a standing position. Hermione felt every ache in her bones. Arthritis had set in ten years ago and refused to leave. Every remedy, wizarding and Muggle, she'd tried had not worked. She'd resolved herself to living with the pain at this point, but it did make moving difficult.

Ammon steadied her as he helped her out onto the small stage. The lights were bright, but Hermione could see that the lecture hall was full. She smiled as she reached the lectern and patted Ammon's hand. Her wrinkled hand looked especially old when contrasted with his young, firm one. She sighed at the vestiges of time and buried the thought that Sirius wouldn't even recognize her at this point. She wasn't here to discuss Sirius. In fact, she never discussed him or wrote about him in all these years. Even Harry and Ginny knew not to bring it up. He was her burden to carry, and carry it she would.

"Good morning," she greeted the hall before she was off, discussing the book and her theories laid out within.

By the time the talk was over, an hour later, Hermione could barely stand. Ammon rushed forward to help her back to the antechamber as the hall exploded into applause. She smiled faintly at the sound. Such enthusiastic praise usually meant she'd given an excellent lecture.

"Another cup of tea, if you would Ammon," Hermione said as he settled her into the chair. She had to sit very straight in order for her back to not ache, but getting off her knees and hips was like a breath of fresh air.

"Of course, Ms. Granger-Weasley," Ammon said and hurried to the side-board.

"Hermione," she said. "Call me Hermione."

"Oh, if you insist, Hermione." Ammon sounded so in awe of her, and Hermione found herself hoping he truly would owl her. She'd love to help him complete his studies.

"How long have we got?"

"They're organizing the line now. We have about thirty minutes before you need to be out in the lobby for the book signing."

"Excellent. Just enough time for you to tell me what you are studying and what you hope to study then."

Ammon blushed and Hermione found it charming. "I'm sure you aren't interested—"

"Bah, Ammon. Tell an old witch what your interests are. It'll keep my mind off the pain in my knees."

Ammon brought the tea service over and served them both as he began talking rapid-fire about his interests. Hermione listened and offered suggestions where they seemed appropriate. This was what she enjoyed about her book tours. The chance to meet and discuss with other scholars. Maybe this wouldn't be her last one.

* * *

_August 2102_

* * *

Ginny had died last year. It was just Hermione and Harry rattling around Grimmauld Place, and it felt lonely. Their grandchildren were having children at this point and visits were becoming few and far between. Hermione was exhausted. She'd just returned from her fifteenth book tour and knew with a certainty that it would be her last one.

Hermione settled slowly into a chair in the library of Grimmauld Place. She wanted to write a letter to Ammon. He had become a surrogate child over the years, and they had stayed in touch as his career grew and built. She hadn't seen him in some time and hoped she could convince him to come and visit her in England. She knew in her bones that her time traveling abroad was finished.

She'd just signed the letter and sent it off when she felt a strange sensation in her chest.

"Huh," she grunted and slipped sideways in the chair. The move should have been excruciating, but it didn't hurt at all. She didn't seem to have any pain. She closed her eyes a final time.

Harry found her a few moments later, assuming she had fallen asleep. When he realized she hadn't, he kept his stiff upper lip as he called for St Mungo's. Somehow, he had always known he would be the last of the 'Golden Trio' to live. It seemed his prediction came true, and he found he was sadder about it than he had thought he would be.

* * *

_When Hermione opened her eyes, she was standing in a brilliant garden. More beautiful than anything she'd ever seen in her entire life. And yet, it was so familiar. She had caught glimpses of it eighty years ago. Hermione couldn't believe it had been eighty years since she'd seen Sirius._

_She was all alone in the garden, and Hermione walked forward along the path between the trees. The trees were all full of fruit, everything in a bright technicolor that didn't seem quite real. As she turned the corner, she came face-to-face with the man she had been mourning for most of her life._

" _Sirius," she breathed. He looked the same. He looked like thirty-seven-year-old Sirius, and she wanted to cry. He looked so beautiful and whole._

" _Kitten." Sirius smirked at her. Hermione's breath caught in her throat at the term of endearment. She hadn't heard it in so long. "Or should I say cougar?"_

_She laughed, even as tears poured down her cheeks. Sirius gathered her up in his arms, and Hermione winced at the look of her wrinkled, gnarled hands clutched around the lapels of his leather jacket._

" _I don't care, love," Sirius said, pressing a fierce kiss to her lips. "I don't care. I've been waiting for you for eighty years. I would have waited for another eighty if I had to."_

" _Sirius," Hermione sighed, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him as close as she could get him. For the first time in decades, Hermione's heart felt full and unbroken. It was a balm to her soul that she hadn't realized she needed._

" _Hermione," Sirius breathed into her neck and Hermione shuddered. Somehow, even all these years later, this was right. Being in Sirius' arms was home. "There are a few people here who have also been waiting to see you."_

_Hermione pulled back, and Sirius wrapped an arm around her waist, the other held her hand, helping her to walk forward, although each step became easier than the last. She hadn't felt any pain as she died, but her body had been wracked with it for so many years, it was muscle memory to continue moving in ways that she knew would cause her the least amount of pain._

_They turned around another bend in the path and there stood Ron. Her parents were behind him, as were Fred, Molly, Arthur, and Ginny. James and Lily were there as was Remus and Tonks. Everyone she loved had come to greet her, and Hermione's heart seemed to fill at the sight._

" _Come, let me show you the ropes," Sirius said, guiding her forward toward her people. Hermione couldn't wait to begin her life with Sirius after all of these years. She laughed as Ron picked her up and twirled her around. She sounded so young and carefree, even to her old ears. She was finally where she had longed to be all of those years. She was home._


End file.
